Beyond the Silver Lining
by kdinthecity
Summary: Finale to the Darkness Trilogy, Zuko and Katara think they're just visiting family in the South Pole, but suddenly it becomes more about diplomacy and conspiracy. Meanwhile, trouble brews back home in the Fire Nation, and there's news from Ba Sing Se. It may not be war, but it's world-wide chaos!
1. Tarnished

"Hello, Zuzu. To what do I owe the great honor of a visit from the Fire Lord?"

Zuko decided that his sister may not be well, but she was certainly acting like herself today. He regretted that it had been so long since he last visited, but a lot had happened recently. He also noticed she was wearing actual clothes this time instead of the usual pajamas. And her hair was fixed—she looked more like herself, too.

"I'm your brother. Do I need another reason to visit? Besides, I care about you, Azula." He inwardly cringed as he added the last part—not because it wasn't true, but because she had a tendency to toy with him whenever he made any attempts at expressing such sentiments.

"Oh, Zuzu, you're so dramatic sometimes," she intoned.

 _Yup, there it is. A classic Azula line._

"But I suppose family is important," she continued. "We're all we've got. Unless you count our crazy Uncle. How _is_ General Teabender these days?"

 _Well, there's Lee._ But Zuko didn't think Azula was ready for that bit of news. _And also Katara._ But his sister wouldn't be thrilled about that announcement, either. Besides, he'd botched his _proposal_ in Ba Sing Se and planned for a much better one during their upcoming trip to the South Pole. He'd venture to guess as to why she didn't mention their mother.

"Zuzu, you can't space out like a wolfbat. People might think you're _crazy_." Azula said the last word in a sing-song voice.

He came back to his senses. "S-s-sorry. Um, Uncle is fine. He's in Ba Sing Se. But enough about him. How are you?"

"Oh… you know what they say. About the silver lining."

Zuko laughed. That was another thing he'd botched. The saying about the cloud and the lining. One version ended with something about a silver sandwich. Wow, that was back at the Boiling Rock when he and Sokka rescued Suki. And now those two were engaged. His second attempt involved the moon instead of a cloud. With the person to whom _he_ was engaged... sort of.

His sister scowled at him. "You're doing it again, bat boy."

He cleared his throat. "Um, good, Azula. I'm glad you're able to find a little hope. Even when it's cloudy."

"Mmm. Clouds are interesting, Zuzu. You know why?"

"Uhh, because they have a silver lining?"

"No, dummy. Think beyond your stupid silver lining for a second. Clouds are made up of water, dust, and air. I just think that's… interesting."

Zuko didn't get it at first. And then he did. "Oh. The elements. Except for—"

"Oh, fire is there. The conditions have to be _just_ right. And then…"

Zuko thought he saw it flash in her eyes before they said it together. "Lightning."

He shivered. She smiled.

A few minutes of silence passed before she spoke again. "You know how lightning outlines the clouds when there's a storm?"

"Yeah."

"That's what I think of when I hear that saying… about the silver lining."

Zuko closed his eyes. It made sense coming from her. She had always been a perfect storm. And always beyond his reach.

"Zuko, I'm sorry."

His eyes shot open. "What!?"

He couldn't decide what shocked him more—the use of his real name or the apology—and he had no idea what she would be sorry for.

The moment was so fleeting and so surreal. She reached out with tentative fingers and touched the spot on his chest where under layers of thick crimson fabric a scar spoke of a very different exchange between brother and sister. Gold eyes met copper and melded together like precious metals, but only for a split second, because then the heat was too unbearable for them both.

"Ming!" Azula called out suddenly. "Will you please tell the Fire Lord that I am tired and do not wish to have visitors right now?"

Her guard came to the door and looked questioningly at Zuko. Azula dropped her hand and turned away from him. He made a motion toward her but then thought better of it. "Umm, I'll see you… next time."

She didn't answer until Zuko was a few strides past her door. "Will you tell mother?"

He stopped and turned to look at her, but she still faced away from him. "Tell her what?"

"That I'm sorry."

"You can tell her yourself. She's also in Ba Sing Se, but I expect her return any day now."

"Just tell her for me. OK?" Azula's voice was just above a whisper.

"Sure."

Zuko made it halfway down the hospital corridor before the realization hit him. He ran back toward his sister's room with the speed of an eelhound. "Ming! Azula!"

They burst through her door to find her sitting on the edge of her bed with the belt of her tunic looped around her neck. The slipknot had been tied and hung loosely at her collarbone, and she gripped the other end tightly in her hands. Even after Zuko lifted the noose from her neck, she wouldn't let go of the loose end.

"No, Azula, no! Don't! _Please_ —what were you thinking?" He knew words were likely pointless, so he sat next to her on the bed and pulled her into an embrace. He couldn't remember the last time he'd hugged his sister—or if he ever had.

"There is no silver lining," she whispered. "Only darkness."

He could feel the wet heat from her tears on his neck. And then the same on his cheeks from his own. "It's always darkest before the dawn," he choked out.

She stiffened at the mentioning of one of their mother's sayings. She tried to pull away, but he held on tighter. _No, Azula. Like you said. We're all we've got._ It wasn't entirely true, but in that moment, it felt like it.

"Mother hates me," Azula said in her normal voice—as if she hadn't been crying at all—as if she hadn't just tried to take her own life, even.

Zuko then released her. He had to remember, this was Azula. And she could be as creepy as a catgator. "She doesn't hate you."

"Easy for you to say. She just loooooooooves you, Zuzu."

Zuko rolled his eyes. _So we're back to this now._ "Ming, can you get us some _tea_?" He hoped she understood his emphasis. A little sun poppy and a nap would do his sister good. "Azula, Mom wasn't the only one of our parents to play favorites. We're both pretty fucked up because of them. We just have to… move past all that and try not to make their same mistakes, I guess."

Azula eyed him with an expression he couldn't quite read. "Hmm, so no world domination for you, dear Fire Lord?"

 _Ugh, OK, tea please? Hurry Ming_ … "Azula—"

"What about domination on the homefront? Does Katara like it rough?"

"What!?" Zuko didn't think Azula could possibly be talking about _that_ , but he thought back to the _one_ time he felt guilty about things getting a little rough.

"Aww, Zuzu, you're blushing. I would have never thought—"

"Shut up."

"Well, mother didn't like it rough. But father sure liked to give it to her."

"What!?"

"Poor little Zuzu. Come on, don't tell me you didn't know. That's probably why she left, dum dum. Because she was weak… and a coward."

"Don't talk about Mom like that!"

"Whatever. Of course you'll defend her. You're her favorite. I don't know why she didn't just fight back. Maybe if someone would have told father no for once, we wouldn't be in this situation."

"You know Ozai wouldn't take no for an answer."

"He could have been a great leader if he'd just had his priorities straight."

"Of course you'll defend him. You're his favorite." _Ming! Tea!_

Azula's guard arrived as if she heard his silent demands. A spread of tea was presented before them. His sister breathed in the steam and took a long sip.

"The sun poppy tea, huh? It's easier to just put me to sleep than deal with me."

"Azula, you just tried to kill yourself. You're not thinking clearly. You need to rest."

"You and Mother, always taking the easy way out. Pretending like you care when you really don't."

"STOP TALKING ABOUT HER LIKE THAT! And I do care! I—love you, Azula." He didn't know what came over him. First he was hugging her, now this? He knew it was true, but it was an unsettling sort of emotion. Like he knew he would do anything to protect her. Like something he'd felt for her before but had lost over the years. It felt raw… and a little bit painful. Like maybe she had even tried to hurt herself before. _There was this conversation by the turtleduck pond..._

"No, you don't," she replied curtly. "Love is for the weak anyway. You're weak just like her. And you took father's punishment just like her."

Azula's eyes rested on his face, the scar, for just a few seconds before she yawned and shifted her position in the bed. "Goodnight, Zuzu. Glad we could have this sibling bonding moment over our family history. Come back when you want to share more horror stories."

Zuko gaped at her. He wasn't sure how to respond to that. He didn't know what to think about this whole visit with Azula. It was time to leave now, he supposed. He stopped at the doorway to give Ming special instructions to keep a close watch on her. Another thought struck him, but he wasn't sure if she would hear him or not.

"You know Azula, Mom didn't fight back for a reason. She did it to protect us." He sighed. Maybe she wouldn't understand the sacrifice. He still couldn't fathom it, really. Not since he'd seen Ursa's scars. He wondered how Azula knew. _Had she actually seen him?_ The idea made him feel a little sick to his stomach, so he pushed it out of his mind. _No, Azula, Mother didn't hate you._

"She took his punishment so that we didn't have to." With that, he left.

* * *

 **A/N:** Welcome to the conclusion of the Darkness Trilogy! I knew the story would have three parts when I started, but I feel like I've come a long way since Zuko's nightmare in the first chapter of _Darkness Before Dawn_. Hell, the characters have come a long way, too. Except for Azula, so maybe she'll get some attention in this installment.

I apologize for not including the suicide trigger warning at the beginning of the chapter. I wanted the reader to realize it at the same time Zuko did. But I don't take these things lightly as anyone who has followed me since the beginning would know. For some, this isn't fiction, it's reality. My author's notes won't help, but there IS help out there.

Like the other two parts of the series, the title comes from a saying, "Every cloud has a silver lining," and that expression is shared in a conversation between Katara and Ursa as a Joo Dee in _Not Stalking Firelord Zuko_ , Chapter 23 by Emletish. I wouldn't be writing my own trilogy if I hadn't stumbled upon hers.

If you're landing here for the first time (because I am shamelessly using this chapter to earn points in a writing competition) then there are 60 chapters that set the stage for this scene/fic. There are also a couple of references to the Ozai-Ursa backstory, _Burning Passion_ , which is my darkest piece in the Darkness universe.

Speaking of the competition, this is for the Nets, Level: Four, an unfortunate turn of events with a wolfbat, eelhound, catgator, and turtleduck. Word count: 1678


	2. Steps in the Right Direction

Zuko made it to about the same point in the hospital corridor before slamming himself against the wall and sinking to the floor. His brain had finally caught up to what had just happened, but he still couldn't seem to wrap his mind around the meaning of it.

 _Azula—my perfect sister, always in control, always controlling—just tried to take her own life?_

 _Azula—who tried to steal my throne, threatened the people I care the most about, and would rather see me dead—and I told her I love her?_

"Fire Lord Zuko! Are you OK!?"

Zuko recognized the voice, and through bleary eyes he made out the face of one of his guards. "I'll be fine, Corporal Tamotsu. I just… need a moment."

They both turned their heads at the sound of shouts and murmurs from down the hall. Tamotsu grimaced. "We're relocating Fire Sage Satoru today. He's, uhh, not too happy about it."

Surprisingly, Zuko welcomed this diversion. "Really? Where are you taking him?"

"To prison. He's regained all his gross motor functions and has been attacking doctors and nurses. He still can't form coherent speech, but I don't think any of us want to hear what he has to say anyway," the Corporal answered.

"Wow. What are the charges against him?" Zuko figured he should know this, but he honestly hadn't given the Fire Sage a second thought since their encounter at the Black Cliffs.

"Well, he had some outstanding assault charges from before his last hospital stay, actually. And then kidnapping. And attacking the Fire Lord." Tamotsu's expression darkened.

 _Well, we were technically fighting an Agni Kai, but I guess those are illegal, too._

"Are you sure you're OK? Can I get you anything?"

Zuko considered himself fortunate to have such attentive guards. "No, I think I'll just sit here for a few more minutes. Thank you, Corporal. You're dismissed."

Zuko closed his eyes and listened to Satoru's garbled grunts and shouts echo throughout the corridor. Finally they faded, and the silence yielded clarity of thought. _Azula is getting worse. She needs help._

Silence was always short-lived, though. "Excuse me, Fire Lord Zuko?"

His heart started racing at the sight of Azula's guard. He stood abruptly, holding his arms out to maintain his balance. "Ming! Is everything OK?"

"She's fine, my Lord. She's sleeping."

Zuko leaned against the wall again just in case he needed it for support. "Has she ever—"

"Not to my knowledge, no." Ming's gaze seemed fixated on the pattern in the floor tiles as she spoke.

"Is she getting worse because Dr. Jung is not here? I was thinking of writing to him."

"I don't know. I didn't purposely listen to her conversations with the doctor, but whenever I happened to overhear, it sounded very much like what happened today."

"What do you mean?"

"Where she shifts like that. One minute she's apologizing to your mother, and the next she says she hates her."

"Oh, right." That was pretty uncharacteristic for Azula. To waver like that. He wondered if that meant she was truly getting better or continuing in her downward spiral, though.

"So, actually, my Lord, I came to ask you a question." At this, she finally made eye contact.

"Uhh, OK, sure," was his not-very-lordlike response.

"I heard you were going to the South Pole. I was wondering if…"

Zuko furrowed his brow. He knew what she was going to ask, but he wasn't sure how to answer. If Azula hadn't just elevated herself into a higher risk category, he'd be fine with her guard taking some time off to visit her boyfriend. _If only the stupid doctor hadn't insisted on staying in Ba Sing Se… with my mother…_

Ming shuffled her feet. Zuko detected her nervousness in the motion of her voice, too. "It's just… I've never been. Bato always comes here. And after the incident with Fire Sage Satoru, I realized he makes so many sacrifices for me. And I don't even know what the Water Tribe is like, where he comes from… if I'm going to keep... I feel like I should—"

"Of course. Yes, yes you can go." Zuko knew exactly how she felt. The one other time he'd been to South Pole, he'd only paid attention to two things—the bitter cold and a twelve-year-old bald monk. This time he wanted to learn as much as he could about Katara's culture. Part of him figured he owed this to her, but the other part just wanted to completely know her in every way possible, like a husband would his wife.

"Really!? Oh, thank you, thank you! I promise I'll serve on your guard while we're there. And on the ship. Whatever you need, Fire Lord Zuko. Thank you! I'll go write to Bato right now!"

Zuko watched her walk away with an obvious skip and a hop in her step. He sighed as he pushed himself away from the wall. He needed to formulate a plan for Azula before they left. He'd start by asking the best doctor he knew.

* * *

"The only thing that makes Ming special is that Azula trusts her." Dr. Yang didn't even look up from her notes as she spoke. "Just find a guard _you_ trust to replace Ming in the rotation. Our precious princess will be fine. I'll keep checking on her just as I have been doing ever since Dr. Jung left."

Zuko plopped down in the plush chair in front of her desk. "But I don't want her to… I dunno, regress or anything."

At this, the doctor put down her quill and looked him straight in the eye. "Zuko, you've always been protective of your sister. But you can't protect her from herself."

"What's that supposed to mean?" _I did just protect her from killing herself, didn't I?_

"Azula needs help, yes. But I don't think she's convinced of it, yet. She has to decide on her own to get better. You know your sister as well as I do. If she doesn't feel like she's in control, then it won't happen."

"But what if it's beyond her control? I'm sure if she felt _in control_ , she'd be better already." _And when she feels out of control, she's lost. She gives up. Maybe that's why...  
_

"Zuko, I know you want to swoop in and save her, but it's not going to work. Not this time."

"I… know." _Wait, I didn't say anything about her suicide attempt._ "What do you mean _this time_?"

The doctor's usual cold expression softened. "You don't remember, do you? Oh spirits, I remember it like it was yesterday. You were standing right there in fact. Five—no, six years old."

There were snippets of this memory that Zuko had recalled only just recently. Something about his mother saying that pain could make you stronger. And the eerie feeling he'd had in Azula's room just now—like she had tried to hurt herself before.

Dr. Yang leaned back in her chair and folded her arms across her chest. "Well, the short of it is Azula burned herself on purpose, and you stopped her. Then you came to get me."

He had half-expected her to say something like that, but the bottom of his stomach dropped out anyway. "Why would she burn herself? She would have been what? Four?"

"Well, she wouldn't say at first. She told you later in confidence, but I overheard. She said it was to prove how strong she was. That pain made you stronger."

"Azula said that?" _Not Mother?_

"Yes. So even from a young age she had this warped sense of control. And she was five, by the way. It was just after her fifth birthday."

Zuko remembered the birthday. _Azula threw a huge fit that day. Something about…what was it? The color of her fingernails… after a trip to the royal spa. She had been looking forward to it for a long time. Her first time to go with Mother and…_

" _Min_." He gasped when he said it out loud.

"I wondered if you would remember her."

He didn't remember much except that he never saw her after Azula's fifth birthday. His sister told him she left because she was weak… and a coward. _The same words she said today about…_

"Dr. Yang, who was Min?"

"She was your nanny. From when Azula was born until she turned five. Your mother decided she wanted to come back to work at the hospital. After Min left, though, she quit her work here and never hired another nanny. She kept a pretty close watch on you until…"

 _Until the pain was so unbearable, she couldn't take it any longer._ Zuko would never doubt his mother's strength, but maybe pain didn't make a person stronger. Maybe pain just left a person broken, wounded— _scarred_.

His thoughts were then drawn to the quick glimpse he'd caught of his father's handiwork emblazoned across his mother's back when they were in Ba Sing Se. But he forced the image out of his mind, knowing the path of hatred it would take him down—one that would lead to rage—and he feared it might end with him standing in front of Ozai's prison cell, fueled by the fires of revenge.

No, he was better than that. Stronger than that. He'd said it on the day of the solar eclipse, and it still had to be true. Taking Ozai down was the Avatar's destiny, not his. Zuko had no desire to face his father again anyway. _Because my pain didn't make me stronger, either._

"Zuko?"

He had momentarily forgotten about the doctor.

Dr. Yang circled around her desk and leaned again the edge of it right in front of him. "I can tell that you're lost in your thoughts, but I don't want you to get lost in the darkness."

She was right. He needed to stop dwelling on the past and focus on moving forward even if it was just one step at a time. But there was one thing that still bothered him, although he didn't think knowing one way or the other would really change anything. "Dr. Yang, did Min… was she… did my father…"

The doctor's expression was answer enough, but her words were cut off by her eager intern bursting through the door at that exact moment.

"Dr. Yang! I need your help!" Katara was grinning from ear to ear and excitedly waving a piece of parchment in the air.

Zuko let out a fake cough.

"Oh! I didn't even see you there!" Katara's smile then contorted into a frown. "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt. Is now a bad time?"

Seeing Katara so happy was by far the highlight of his day. "No, no. I was just… leaving."

"Well, you don't have to go," Katara said with a shrug. "Well, unless you _have to_. I just got a letter from Queen Song. In fact, I guess I should ask you about this… since you're the Fire Lord and all… I didn't even think to… I was just going to take care of it myself. Oh, spirits, I'm so sorry."

Zuko and Dr. Yang exchanged confused glances. "Katara, what are you talking about?" he asked.

She cleared her throat and placed a hand over her heart. Zuko wondered if she was trying to catch her breath from her excitement or if she was about to share something she felt passionately about. With Katara, there probably wasn't a difference. She always threw herself full force, head-on, and whole-heartedly into her cause. Just watching her took his breath away, Zuko had to admit.

"Well, before the Winter Solstice Festival, Song was telling Suki and me how the Earth Kingdom doesn't have widespread access to birth control. She wants to pursue a trade agreement where the Fire Nation provides our contraceptives, and the Earth Kingdom will send herbal medicines. I was just going to ask Dr. Yang what she thought, but I should have come to you first. I'm sorry, Zuko."

He looked at the parchment in her hand. He knew this would be one of the letters that would likely get buried in his piles of paperwork. It wasn't that he didn't think it was important, it just wasn't priority, at least not in the immediate aftermath of war.

When Zuko didn't answer right away, Katara felt the need to justify herself further. "It's just that after the war, there are so many hungry mouths to feed anyway. The Earth Kingdom struggles with overpopulation, and in the lower districts, women are seen as second-class citizens. Sometimes they don't even have access to the basic healthcare they need much less any kind of prenatal services."

"And here in the Fire Nation, we could use the herbal remedies. Some of the poorer villages that were left ransacked after the war have suffered from widespread illness. High dollar medications are just not accessible for them," Dr. Yang added.

Zuko gaped at them. So, what they were proposing was _very much_ a priority in the aftermath of war, he decided. But he never would have known it. He would have easily dismissed this issue, and he suddenly felt ashamed. But when he looked back at Katara's hopeful expression, he felt something else. _Appreciation? Admiration? Adoration?_ It was all of those things and more. Something beyond description, but something that he knew made him also feel full... whole... complete. _She will make a damn good Fire Lady._

"No, Katara, I think it's great. You do what you need to do."

"Really? So you're not… mad?"

"Mad? Why would I be mad? You're being helpful. You're being… _you_. I love it… I love you."

Dr. Yang let out a snort then mumbled an apology under her breath. She settled back down at her desk and resumed her work, ignoring what she now deemed an exchange of sappy romantic confessions.

"So, you're OK with it?" Blue eyes brightened.

Golden eyes sparkled. "Katara, the letter was addressed to you, wasn't it?"

"Yeah."

"Then, you take care of it."

"But I don't need you to sign off on it or—"

"Katara, just do it." Zuko raised an eyebrow and then added with a smirk, "Fire Lord's orders."

* * *

"I am sick and tired of you ordering me around all the time!" Arik wailed.

Zuko was just about sick and tired of having an eleven-year-old to contend with all the time.

"But you can't leave me here AGAIN. Look what happened the last time you left!" The boy raised his hands in the air in a very dramatic fashion.

Zuko _did_ feel terrible about the kidnapping, but he was prepared for Arik to use that as leverage. "I will have a personal guard assigned to you. I hand-picked him myself."

"Then I bet he's a real assface."

"Hey! Watch your language!"

"Umm, Zuko?" Jin piped in. "I was planning on visiting Ba Sing Se when you guys go to the South Pole. Maybe I could take Arik with me?"

"I've always wanted to go to Ba Sing Se!" Arik whined. "But his _royal highness_ here wouldn't let me."

"How about I send you back to Two Rivers you ungrateful little—"

Jin placed a hand on his arm. The softness of the gesture was enough to quell his rising temper. He appreciated the calmness in her voice, too. "Zuko, really. I don't mind."

"But he needs to stay here and focus on his firebending training."

Three sets of eyes then redirected their attention to Lady Za Je who had remained silent up until this point.

"Well, _I_ can't teach him, if that's what you're thinking," was his advisor's pointed answer. "When Fire Lord Zuko leaves the country, the council is very busy. It was quite stressful to manage my workload while teaching the boy last time."

"Well, that settles it," Arik said. "Ba Sing Se here I come… _finally_!"

"Not so fast," Zuko interjected. "Lady Za Je, didn't you say something about Arik starting at the Academy?"

"I did make that recommendation, yes. It is still pending school board approval, though. And if it goes through, he should wait until the start of a new term."

"When will that be?"

"After the Summer Solstice."

"What!?" Zuko didn't know why this surprised him. He distinctly remembered this from growing up. Azula's birthday fell on the Summer Solstice which meant she was counting down the days until she turned eight. It also meant she was the oldest in her class. Of course, it didn't matter, really. They had both received firebending lessons way before attending the Academy, and she had long since passed Zuko's ability much less that of her school peers.

"Yes, but if he trains hard enough between now and then, he can start as a fourth year—with kids his own age," Lady Za Je added.

"But I don't even have anyone to train him! And there aren't any firebending masters in Ba Sing Se… well, except Uncle _." Uncle? Would he do it?_

Jin clapped her hands together. "Oh, General Iroh would make a great teacher!"

 _Of course he would. He taught me after all, and I was just as stubborn as Arik. Probably worse._ "Jin, would you mind—"

"I was going to the Jasmine Dragon anyway!"

"Well, I guess it can't hurt to ask. I'll send him a messenger hawk tonight. But Arik, just so you know, my Uncle won't take any of your ostrich horseshit!"

"So… does this mean I'm really going to Ba Sing Se?" The young firebender's eyes widened with surprise and excitement.

"Yes. But I'm still sending Corporal Tamotsu with you." Zuko glanced back at Jin who nodded in understanding. "And Arik, you should send a letter to your parents letting them know where you're going."

"Sure, sure," Arik replied.

Zuko knew that the boy wouldn't do it. Then again, his eleven-year-old self probably wouldn't have either. Maybe he should include something about that in his letter to his uncle. _What was it the old man used to tell me? What goes around comes around?_

Then he remembered the rest of Iroh's version of that saying, "Unless you keep to the straight path and head in the right direction."

* * *

 **A/N:** For the Pro-Bending Circuit Competition  
Equipment: Weights  
Word Count: 3,176

 **Notes:** I do feel obligated to continue with the suicide disclaimer here. I've said this before, but as far as any actual clinical claims or connections when it comes to mental illness or instability, I make none. I've dealt with a few things—abuse, depression, anxiety—and can more freely explore those themes in fiction, I think. But with suicide, I can't. I've never been at that point, and I don't know if I've written Azula's situation in a way that conveys it, either. All I can say is that everyone's situation is different, everyone's needs are different, and everyone's approach to healing is different. And that everyone has value.

On a lighter note, to recap, Bato and Ming are a pairing from _Not Stalking Firelord Zuko_ by Emletish. In the show, Ming is the guard who sneaks in special tea to Iroh when he's in prison, by the way. I had forgotten this until I re-watched some episodes recently, including _Bato of the Water Tribe_. I'm not sure that I would pair those two together, actually. But oh well, I'm committed at this point. What would we call this ship, I wonder? Mato? Bing? Ba-da-bing?

Lastly, if you want more of the juicy details on "Mistress Min," that is included in my Urzai backstory, _Burning Passion_. And if you want a sneak peek at the goings-on in the South Pole, I started a sweet little fic about the interactions between Hakoda and Zuko entitled _The Dragon and the Wolf._ Enjoy!


	3. Into the Darkness

Preparing to leave for the South Pole nearly made Zuko want to jump into the frigid waters once they got there never to resurface again. They wouldn't need a Fire Lord anymore anyway, because he had made sure _all_ of his responsibilities would be covered in his absence. Maybe he could just hibernate in an igloo with Katara the whole time. She had a fantasy about igloos, he recalled.

Despite the distracting thoughts about taking Katara in an igloo… or on his desk… or near the turtleduck pond… he willed himself to focus for the few minutes he had before his next appointment. He redirected his attention to a few scrolls he had been neglecting. The first was confirmation that all was well with his uncle in Ba Sing Se, and that he would be happy to take on Arik as a student. Zuko quickly skimmed over the part where he was supposed to relay some proverbial comparison between tea and breath control when firebending. The next letter contained Chief Hakoda's reply that they had arrived safely back at the South Pole and anxiously awaited their upcoming visit. The last letter, however, gave him reason to pause. It was from his mother.

 _Dearest Zuko,_

 _I would love to tell you that Dr. Jung and I are making great progress with the Joo Dees here in Ba Sing Se. Well, the doctor is doing great. I won't lie to you, though. I am not doing so well. It's too much. It brings back too many memories. I wish I was stronger than this, but I've held on to the pain for too long. Now that I see you are safe and sound, I can let my guard down._

 _Jung has suggested that I take a trip to a place where there are no memories to haunt me, somewhere I can meditate and clear my mind. I have always been intrigued by the Air Nomad philosophy, so I intend to leave Ba Sing Se soon and head for the Eastern Air Temple. Please don't worry about me. I will be fine, and I WILL come home. I promise._

 _I love you,  
Mom_

Zuko could feel the telltale bloodboiling sensation. He wasn't mad about her travel plans. True, he wanted her home more than anything, but it wasn't his place to tell her what to do. She could go wherever she wanted. It was her audacity to make a promise like that. _Because I don't need yet another reason not to trust her._

A timely knock at his door kept him from dwelling on his bitter thoughts for much longer.

He stuffed the scrolls in a drawer. "Come in."

A young man with black wavy hair and glasses tentatively entered. Zuko guessed that he wasn't that much older than he was. Early twenties perhaps?

The man offered the traditional bow. "Fire Lord Zuko, I am Satoru the Third, son of Fire Sage Satoru the Second, here to manage his affairs?"

Zuko stood and returned the gesture. "Yes, please have a seat. I'm not sure how much you know already."

Satoru settled in the plush chair opposite the desk and eyed the scorch marks on the wall with some concern before speaking. "Well, my uncle only said that he had threatened… and hurt a lot of people. You included. Are you…well, my Lord?"

Zuko noted the sincerity in the young man's voice and wondered how the son could be so different from the father. Then again, he'd just mentioned an uncle. Perhaps he'd been more influenced by said uncle and was trying to be better than his father. _Hmm… sounds familiar._

"I'm fine, thank you. He was injured also… in the fight. Has anyone talked to you about that?"

"Yes. When I first arrived, I went to the hospital to collect his things. A nice doctor there explained everything to me. About the alterations in his brain. She said therapy was largely successful in retaining his motor functions, but that his speech was still labored, and he may be prone to angry outbursts. I don't see how this is much different than how he was before—although perhaps it is a blessing that we can't understand the ludicrous things he says now."

Zuko caught himself gaping. The man had an air of intelligence about him—an elegance in the way he spoke and carried himself. He was almost like _royalty_. "Um, right. So, I take it you weren't close to your father."

"Everything was fine with Dad until the war ended. Then he just kinda lost his mind. I think for him it had a real spiritual significance. The Fire Nation was Agni's chosen people. Without the war, he had no purpose. He lost his way. I'm just sorry that he was in such a revered position as Fire Sage where he could do so much damage. If there's any way I can possibly atone for the grievances he's caused…"

"Well, it's certainly not your fault. You don't owe anybody anything for your father's actions. And I'm glad you have your uncle. In the Earth Kingdom, right?"

"Yes, my Uncle Loban and his business partner operate a refinery. I was an engineer working on weaponry during the war, so my skills have been an asset there. My Uncle can be a little… money obsessed. But he took me in when I had nowhere else to go. For that I am grateful and forever indebted to him."

Zuko rested his chin on folded hands. "So… do you enjoy working there?"

Satoru shrugged. "It's OK. It's… a job, you know?"

"But you feel like you have to stay there because of your uncle?"

"No. Uhh. Yes. I don't know. It's… complicated. He told me I could take all the time I needed here in the Capital. To reconcile with my past—with my Dad."

"Do you wish to see him?"

"Yeah. I guess. It's been over a year, so…"

"Well, I don't want to pressure you, but your father has left a Fire Sage position open. Typically they are filled along family lines, so—"

"I know. My grandfather was one. And I thought you might mention it. I just—I don't know. I'm not like that—I'm not like them."

Zuko raised an eyebrow, although he was not surprised by Satoru's statement in the least. "The other Fire Sages are nothing like your father, I assure you."

The young man sighed. "I know, that's not what I meant. I would just be afraid in taking the position that I'd _become_ like him—my father… my grandfather, too."

"I know exactly what you mean, _believe me_. But I still want you to think about it. Because even though I struggle with that every day, I'm still the Fire Lord. Somebody has to do it, and I'm at least _trying_ to do it right."

* * *

Since Jin and his other guards were busy preparing for their big trip, Zuko decided to escort Satoru to the prison himself. It had been well over a year since he'd been there, although he'd contemplated going several times, particularly when experiencing rage toward his father. Today he felt fairly benign where the former Fire Lord was concerned, perhaps due to the nature of his advice given to Satoru earlier. He told the man he would simply wait for him at the entrance.

But then he passed by the corridor that led to his father's cell. And even though his brain was telling him not to, his feet led him down the stairs, deeper into the bowels of the prison, into the darkness. He realized his mistake too late—when he found himself standing in front of iron bars with a lump in his throat and a sense of dread weighing heavy in his stomach.

Zuko breathed a sigh of relief when he discovered that Ozai appeared to be sleeping. He took in the sight of him—thin frame, sallow skin, and matted hair—so drastically different from the commanding presence his father once had. He found the image to be quite validating and silently vowed never to come here again.

As Zuko turned to leave, a voice croaked, "I can smell fear, you know."

Zuko was frozen on the spot, but he did not turn around to address the speaker. "I'm not afraid of you." He was surprised at the firmness in his voice despite the weakness he felt in his knees.

"Fathers can also tell when their children are lying. Why are you here? You at least owe me an explanation." The edge to the voice was now replaced with something smoother, like silk.

Zuko recognized the velvety tone— _manipulation._ He clinched his fists. "You are no father to me. And I owe you nothing."

"You owe me EVERYTHING. Do you think you'd be where you are if it weren't for me? That's _royal_ blood flowing through your veins. MY BLOOD."

Zuko knew that tone, too. _Entitlement._ He turned to face his father, and words began to spill out, raw and unbidden. "This was your intention all along, huh? For _me_ to become Fire Lord? So, you thought a little color on my face would match the royal robes? Complement the crown? Was that it?" He forcefully lifted a finger to point to his scar. "Or sending me away for three years was just so I could get some wordly exposure. Setting me up for failure in finding the Avatar was so I could learn from my mistakes. Yeah, I get it now. I OWE YOU. All of this pain and suffering is YOUR doing." He then pointed his finger toward the dark corner from where his father's voice swelled— _like smoke._

Now fully afire, Ozai rose from the bed and rammed into the bars of his cell. "YOU'VE LEARNED NOTHING. Pain can make you stronger! Suffering will be your teacher!"

Zuko kept his position a few paces away. "NO! Pain HURTS! And suffering only tears you down."

"Only because you are weak," Ozai snarled. "You've always been weak."

It was at this point that Zuko realized he didn't have to listen to this. He shouldn't have indulged his father even this much. For the second time, he made an effort to leave, only getting about as far as the last attempt.

Because Ozai wouldn't let him go so easily. "Maybe you aren't my blood after all. Your mother ran off with some doctor, maybe there were others. Maybe you're the bastard son of a—"

Zuko spun back around. "DON'T YOU DARE TALK ABOUT MOTHER LIKE THAT! _You're_ the one having affairs and fathering bastard children!"

Zuko felt the fire flare in his fists—and burn in his blood—and knew he needed to leave NOW, but there was something in his father's expression. It looked almost like _panic._

"Zuko, did she come asking for money? Don't listen to anything that bitch says. Those peasant whores will take advantage of you. Don't wait until you have one with her swollen lips wrapped around your cock, looking up at you like she's begging for more. The next day she'll be begging all right. For money and protection of her unborn child. She'll ruin you. She'll ruin us all!"

"STOP IT! JUST STOP IT, OK!?" Zuko felt the fire burning in his face now. He had not expected his father to bring up Lin—or Lee. He would almost defend them before he would defend himself. _Because Lee will be free from this._

"You've already done it. I can see it on your face."

"Wha-what?" _How does he know I've pledged to provide for and protect them?_

"You fucked a peasant, didn't you? Zuko, as Fire Lord, you have to keep high standards. If you're going to pull that kind of shit, you need to be careful."

Zuko's mind was reeling now. "You—you're giving me advice? About women? No, no, no, this is not—" _This is way worse than Azula bringing up the subject._

"And you always have to stay in control, Zuko. You can't let a woman get the better of you, because then she will be the one to bring you down— _control her_ , Zuko, before she controls you."

"SHUT THE FUCK UP!"

"Oh, I've hit a sore spot, haven't I? Tell me about her, son. Got yourself a pretty little Water Tribe whore?"

"What the—how do you? Don't you _DARE_ —guards!"

Zuko called for an escort out of the prison because the rage he felt was _blinding_. He tried to block out Ozai's maniacal laughter as he scurried back up the staircase and out the prison doors, gasping in breaths of fresh air. He had expected to hear threats about his mother, maybe even his sister. The mentioning of Lin and Lee had caught him off guard. But he had not expected his father to make any references to Katara. _How does he know? How does he always know where it would hurt the most?_

The thought literally made him sick to his stomach.

The next thing he knew, a gentle hand was touching his shoulder as he dry heaved on the prison steps.

"Are you OK, Fire Lord Zuko?" Satoru handed him a handkerchief.

"Um, I'll be fine." Zuko straightened, wiped his mouth, and tried to regain his composure. "So, I hope your visit with your father went better than mine."

"It was terrible," Satoru deadpanned.

"Sorry to hear that."

"Well, it did help me come to a decision about the Fire Sage position."

"Oh, yeah?"

"I would like to meet with the other Fire Sages, of course, but I am interested in exploring the opportunity. And I thank you for the honor and the privilege. I am truly unworthy, but would consider it a high calling to serve the Fire Nation in this way."

"Of course. What made you change your mind? If you don't mind me asking…"

"There has been too much darkness in my life, Fire Lord Zuko. It is time to step out into the light."

* * *

 **A/N:** For my own peace of mind and hopefully yours, Ozai does not know about Katara. He says "Water Tribe whore" because that was his derogatory role play term for Ursa. If Zuko's worst fear is becoming like his father, though, his second worst fear is something happening to Katara at his father's hand. Zuko doesn't know how he would manage it, but if Ozai knew how much Katara meant to him—how she is his source of strength and hope—then his father would find a way to hurt him through her.

And yes, this is Satoru from _The Rift._ I read the comic after I named my evil OC Fire Sage, but the canon character's profile even said he was estranged from his father. Perfect.


	4. Picking Battles

"Excuse me, sir. I'm so sorry to bother you, but there is a matter of utmost importance we need to discuss."

Zuko pushed aside his paperwork with a groan. He shouldn't even be working on that much less entertaining any impromptu meetings. He really needed to start packing for their trip to the South Pole. If he didn't get some clothes shoved into a bag soon, he'd be pretty damn cold once they got there. _Mmmm, but Katara could keep me warm…_

"Uhh, sir?"

Zuko eyed the man standing at his door with some annoyance. "Rrrrright. Sorry. What is it? And make it quick."

After a quick bow and a shift in his weight from one foot to the other, the man continued. "It's about Satoru, sir. He's causing some trouble with the guards."

"Trouble? I just sent him to see Fire Sage Shyu. He should be no trouble." Zuko waved a dismissive hand, not so much at the other person, but at the situation in general. _I don't have time for this._

"With all due respect, sir. He's not with the High Sage."

"What? Did he get lost or something?" _I really don't have time for this._

"No, sir. He's right where he's supposed to be. But we would like to relocate him. With your permission, of course."

Zuko raised an eyebrow. "So, you _do_ know where he is?"

"Yes sir."

"Well, then tell him to go see Fire Sage Shyu! Escort him there if you must. The palace grounds can be confusing, but I thought I gave him clear enough directions..." He trailed off as he said the last part, pinching the bridge of his nose in a gesture of frustration.

"Sir?"

Zuko then raised his hands in the air, feeling fire burn at his fingertips. "What are you waiting for? Don't just stand there! I have stuff to do!"

"But the prisoner…"

"Prisoner?" It was at this point that Zuko recognized what the man was wearing—a prison guard's uniform. Realization began to set in.

"I d-d-don't think it would be a good idea to take him to the High Sage, my Lord. In fact, we were going to suggest moving him to our maximum security ward based on his recent attacks on guards and other inmates. Once he's made the transition, perhaps Fire Sage Shyu may visit him if there is some unfinished business—"

"Right, right. Sorry. I was confused. His son is here, also named Satoru. And I just sent him to Fire Sage Shyu. Of course, do whatever you think is necessary with the prisoner."

"There's just one problem, sir."

"What's that?"

"Maximum security day shift is understaffed at the moment. Typically we'd want a one-to-one ratio of guards to prisoners there. It's unusual to have high profile criminals at the Capital prison. They're supposed to go to Boiling Rock."

"Then send him to Boiling Rock."

"They're overrun, too, after all the war criminals were convicted."

"OK, so there's currently no guard in maximum security or what?" Zuko was trying to remember the layout of the prison's sectors— _specifically_ where his father's cell was. He knew it was rather isolated from the rest.

"Well, we had two guards and one prisoner—"

That confirmed it—Zuko then knew they were talking about his father's guards. He had seen them this morning, in fact. ""Well, then I don't see the problem. They're highly trained guards, and Ozai is not the formidable threat he once was, so it should be fine to reassign one of the guards to Satoru."

The man cleared his throat. "We _had_ two guards, sir. One has already been reassigned."

"What!? On whose authority?"

"I was told yours. He's been charged to guard the princess, my Lord."

Zuko felt his breath quicken. He had told Dr. Yang to take care of finding Azula a new guard to serve in Ming's absence while she traveled with them to the South Pole. Why would the doctor think it permissible to remove one of his father's guards for the job? "Aw, fuck. OK. I'll take care of it."

The man made a motion to leave but stopped abruptly. "Sir? What should we do with Satoru in the meantime?"

"Just keep him where he is?"

"But he's attacked other prisoners and severely injured two guards. Maximum security at least allows for more solitary confinement… somewhat… I mean, with one guard, we can't put the prisoners too far from each other, but…"

Zuko shuddered at the idea of Ozai and Satoru being anywhere near each other. His father never really had a high opinion of the Fire Sages, but he felt fairly certain that Satoru had risen to his position under the former Fire Lord's reign. They must've seen eye-to-eye on things then and certainly would now—a death wish for the new Fire Lord among other things.

"Right. So, the guard that's left… he's… pretty damn good at what he does from what I recall. I think he can handle both prisoners, don't you?"

"I, uhhh—"

"Well, it is what it is. If you need to get Satoru away from the others, then so be it. I don't really see any other way."

"Do you wish to speak to the guard yourself? Or come inspect the situation to make sure?"

"NO!" Zuko hadn't meant to raise his voice, but the anger inside him had been brewing since before this conversation even began. "I mean, _no_. I was already at the prison today, and the guard seemed to have everything under control. It's fine. Thank you. Now, please, I need to—"

"Very well, sir." The guard bowed and quickly darted out of the office, seemingly as relieved their meeting was over as Zuko was.

No sooner had the man left than Fire Sage Shyu entered with a quiet knock and a tip of his head. "Good afternoon, Fire Lord Zuko."

The young leader sighed and slumped back in his chair. "Did Satoru come see you?"

"Mmm, yes, he did. But I'm afraid there's a problem."

"A problem?" Zuko rubbed his eyes, weariness overtaking his anger—at least momentarily.

"Well, he's a delightful young man, not anything like his father, I'm grateful to say. But he's not of proper age to be a Fire Sage, yet. He's only seventeen."

"Seventeen!?" Zuko would have never imagined that he was actually older than Satoru the Third.

"Yes, Fire Nation decree says he must be 18 before accepting the position."

"B-b-but I was 17 when I became Fire Lord!"

"The rules for the Fire Lords are different." Shyu's voice remained calm despite Zuko's rise in volume.

With palms slammed against his desktop, emitting a wisp of smoke, Zuko seethed, "I don't see why! They should be the same!"

"But Fire Lords and Fire Sages are different entities, and in order to maintain balance, they should continue to be treated as such," was Shyu's solemn response.

Zuko appreciated his new High Sage's spirit of tradition, he really did, but found it annoying—and encumbering at times. They'd already searched the other Fire Sages' family lines. There weren't many viable options. They could change _that_ rule, perhaps, but it seemed like fudging on Satoru's age would be less encroaching on tradition, at least in Zuko's mind.

Zuko laced his fingers in front of his chin, hoping the gesture would at least keep his angry firebending at bay. "So, we wait until he turns 18. Should be less than a year, I'd imagine."

"His birthday is at the end of the summer, but the decree also says a new Fire Sage must be appointed within four moon cycles or else…"

Zuko groaned. "Or else what?"

"We are forsaken by Agni." The sage bowed his head deeply.

Zuko highly doubted that, but then again he'd never been very religious, and he'd always felt _cursed_ by the sun god anyway. Regardless, Shyu was new in his position as High Sage and things were finally coming together with his addition to the advisory council. Zuko didn't want to jeopardize the fledgling relationship between Fire Lord and the nation's spiritual authorities. As he mulled these thoughts over, Shyu surprised him when he spoke.

"There is one thing we can do. Satoru the Second can remain in the position for another few moon cycles. Then when the gap in time is closed, you can appoint Satoru the Third to be ordained on his eighteenth birthday."

"You want to keep a convicted criminal on as Fire Sage? And you think Agni wouldn't forsake us then?"

"His state of incarceration shouldn't affect his bearing of the title. There is nothing in the decrees on the matter, so—"

"So it's OK with _Agni_ as long as we follow some set of written rules? Who wrote the decrees, may I ask? The Sun God himself?" This was precisely why Zuko didn't readily adopt the national religion. There were too many things that didn't make sense to him. Yet he was _trying_ to figure out a way to embrace tradition and move forward at the same time—a most arduous task, it would seem.

When Zuko realized that Shyu was only staring back at him blankly, he added, "Well, he can't _serve_ as Fire Sage, if that's what you're implying. I've just moved him to solitary confinement!"

The High Sage then shook himself from some sort of stupor. "Of course not. He doesn't even have to know. It would just be for… documentation purposes."

 _Right. So Agni can see we followed the damn rule book._ "Fine. Whatever." Zuko rounded his desk and brushed past Shyu. He was effectively done with this conversation—and all others where he felt helpless to find a solution that served everyone well.

* * *

Katara overheard her boyfriend's voice down the hospital hallway when he asked for Dr. Yang. She also knew that her mentor was still dealing with the aftermath of unfortunate events at the Capital prison, so she decided to intercept the Fire Lord herself. As she coaxed him into an empty exam room, she saw her own stress reflected in his expression, so she pulled him in close for an embrace followed by a kiss of surprising length and passion given their location and circumstances.

"Mmmm, I guess I needed that," she said when they pulled away from each other.

Zuko wasn't fully satiated, though. "I need to talk to Dr. Yang. She reassigned one of my father's guards. I don't think—"

Katara placed her index finger over his lips. He furrowed his brow and watched a wave of anxiety crash through the blueness of her eyes as she explained. "It wasn't really Dr. Yang's doing, Zuko. After this morning's incident at the prison, the guard himself asked to be reassigned."

"What _incident_ at the prison? I was there… this morning."

Katara gasped. "Why? Did you…?" Zuko's nervous sideways glance was answer enough.

"Uhh, nevermind," she continued. "After his son visited, Satoru went on another rampage. He injured a couple of guards. When they proposed moving him to your father's ward, one of the guards there kinda freaked out. I found out later that his brother was one of the guards who had been attacked by Satoru."

"Oh." Zuko sighed. "Well, I wouldn't have been surprised if he just went crazy from guarding Ozai. But I'm sorry to hear about his brother. How are they?"

Katara shuddered, the sight and smell of burning flesh still fresh in her mind. "They're in pretty bad shape. I've done a healing session on one of them. The other… he's, ah… it's hard to tell what is _left_ to heal at this point."

"Aw fuck." Zuko raked his hands through his hair. The anger that had been simmering just beneath the surface started to boil again and this time, he didn't know if he could control it. All of this seemed like his fault. Maybe he shouldn't have taken Satoru the Third to the prison. Perhaps he should've killed Satoru the Second in their Agni Kai. It could have easily been considered self defense. The man physically threatened so many others and now had potentially killed a man, an act Zuko could have possibly prevented. But then how could one justify killing with more killing? If he was going to entertain such notions about the former Fire Sage, then he should've sentenced his own father to death at war's end. Things would certainly be easier without either of them. _Why is seeking justice so... hard?_

"Zuko, are you OK?" Katara's calm words always had a way of penetrating his dark thoughts. Except this time they did nothing to quell his rising emotions.

"No. I need to… firebend. Can we spar?"

"Um, sure, I guess. But—"

"Good." With that, anger gave way to determination, and Zuko grabbed her by the wrist, leading her outside the exam room and down the hallway.

It was about a ten minute walk to the training grounds, and Katara shivered as the setting sun yielded to the wintry evening breeze. She looked up to find the moon waning and knew her bending would be weakened because of that and the fact she had been healing all afternoon. She sighed deeply as she took her stance, waiting for Zuko to light the lanterns, the intensity of their flicker reflected in his golden gaze when he finally turned to face her in combat.

A blast of fire met a wall of ice, and suddenly Katara felt like she _could_ do this. Perhaps she had a renewed spark of energy to help Zuko blow off some steam from his stressful day. She could only imagine what might have happened during his visit to the Capital prison. She was curious, but decided she wouldn't ask—he seemed to be doing a good job of leaving all of that behind him. His recent progress—namely the absence of the nightmares—made the news of him going to see his father particularly shocking.

During their routine exchange of attacks and counters, Zuko mulled over similar thoughts. Why had he gone to visit Ozai? And did his father really know about Katara? If anything ever happened to her at the hand of that maniac, then he really would kill him, he was sure of it. It was this line of thinking that fueled his ferocity as they continued their duel—also making him a little reckless.

Katara noticed the transition in Zuko's fighting style—when he went from focused to frenzied. It happened at about the same time that her second wind started to fade. She must have been able to block some of the erratic blasts of fire he shot in her direction. Yet, they had happened so quickly after the last assault, she didn't have enough time to recover her stance.

Zuko knew the minute he released that last blow that he'd gone too far. When the puff of steam cleared from where she had shielded herself with her arms, he nearly keeled over for a second time that day in complete horror and disgust. But he quickly gathered himself and scrambled to her side as she knelt down, cradling her injured arms.

"Oh, fuck, Katara. Oh spirits, I'm so sorry. I didn't—oh, fuck!" He crouched next to her and extended shaky hands toward her, an expression of his complete sense of shame and helplessness.

"It's OK—I should have—I didn't—" she managed in between sobs.

"C-c-can I get you some water? So you c-c-can heal yourself?"

"N-n-no. I've been healing all day. I c-c-can't…"

He closed his eyes, the realization hitting him hard. "Aw, fuck." _She was too tired to fight. Why didn't she say anything? Why did I push her?_

After a few moments of self pity followed by a grapple with indecision, Zuko scooped her up in his arms, mindful of her fresh burns, and began carrying her back to the hospital. He hated having to admit what happened—what he'd done—but he'd have to tell Dr. Yang and hope that she would understand.

* * *

The very weary doctor handed him two glass bottles. "I'm done for today, Fire Lord Zuko, but you can issue the treatment yourself. This one is a saline/mineral solution for cleansing and irrigation. That one, a burn salve." She glanced over at a sleeping Katara who had settled herself down on the couch in Dr. Yang's office. "Apply both tonight and then wrap with this gauze. Reassess and reapply in the morning. By tomorrow afternoon, she should have recovered enough on her own and should be able to try healing herself at that point."

"But we're supposed to leave for the South Pole tomorrow morning," Zuko protested.

Dr. Yang sighed and rolled her eyes. She then handed him an additional bottle of each remedy. "Here. You're stocked up, then. Have a nice trip," she deadpanned.

"Uhh, thanks," he mumbled while trying to balance the two bottles and gauze. He cursed when one slipped from his hands and fell with a crash to the ground.

The doctor let out an exasperated groan. "You're lucky that's my own formula, and I happen to have more of it, _Fire Lord._ " She yanked open a cabinet and thrust another bottle of clear liquid at him. At his obvious frustration, she softened a bit. "It's like tears."

"Huh?"

"The solution is based on human tears. Saline and minerals in our tears have healing and hydrating properties. It's one of my few breakthroughs in my career, and it's proven very effective over the years."

Zuko was certain the doctor's eyes had settled on his scar the entire time she was talking about this supposed _tears_ treatment, but he doubted it had anything to do with that. Perhaps she hadn't developed it until later and wondered if it would have been helpful back then. Regardless, he didn't like the staring or even the rare softness in her tone. He'd expected to be reprimanded for his carelessness in accidentally burning Katara. This strange scrutiny made him feel unexpectedly worse than a scolding would have.

"Th-thanks." Still aware of Dr. Yang's watchful eye, he carefully pocketed the medicines and gently scooped up Katara to carry her to bed.

* * *

It had been several weeks since Zuko had been plagued by a nightmare, but one hit him at full force that night. The setting was the usual—blinding bright lights, deafening chants from the crowd, his own heart pounding in his chest—the Agni Kai arena. Zuko stepped onto the platform, but he was not himself. He rarely was in his dreams anyway. As he approached the cowering figure before him, he heard Ozai's voice bellow from his throat, "Suffering will be your teacher."

Then a shadow lifted, and blue-clad shoulders began to quiver. A veil of wavy hair parted to reveal tear-filled eyes reflecting his fists of fire. Then bronze arms raised to shield her fear-stricken face, and hands were splayed in anticipation of the pain.

This was the point where Zuko almost always woke up in a fit of fear or rage. But this time he didn't. The scene on the platform seemed suspended in time as his unconscious mind worked through the sequence of events, specifically the presence of this new _character._

Her hands as a shield. Those hands that could heal.

Tears could heal, too. Tears then revealed truth…

 _I am not my father._

Then peaceful sleep overtook him at last.


	5. No Place Like Home

Zuko awoke to a faint glow that he assumed was the sun's beckoning, but he didn't feel the usual heat in his blood to signal the start of the day. He didn't feel the heat of her body, either.

"Katara?" He pushed himself to his elbows and squinted into the darkness of the early morning hour.

"Hmm?" She happened to be the source of the light coming from the foot of the bed. As he positioned himself next to her, tucking his chin into the dip of her shoulder, he saw that she was healing herself.

He closed his eyes and sighed. "I'm so sorry, Katara."

"It's—fine now." She released her healing water into a nearby vase and rubbed one hand down the other forearm, assessing her work. Zuko shot a flicker to the wall sconce, offering a light source as he, too, examined her injuries—or lack thereof.

He marveled at the brilliance and the beauty of it—her abilities—and also her smooth, perfect skin. He almost reached out to touch her but then remembered. "I was supposed to—oh—I guess you don't need it, huh?"

Blue questioning eyes urged him to continue. "Err, Dr. Yang gave me a treatment for you. Said you wouldn't be able to heal yourself until later today."

"Well, Dr. Yang relies a lot on her medicines," Katara replied. "And she downplays my bending, too."

Shocked golden eyes widened at her statement. "But you're amazing, Katara. You saved my life more than once. You saved Mom's life… and Uncle's… and…" He drew in a big breath. "And Aang's… and probably loads of people I don't even know about."

Zuko felt a burning sensation in the back of his throat as the realization set in that he would be so utterly lost without her. Everyone he had ever cared about— _even Azula_ —their lives had been in her hands, her remarkable, capable hands. Water was the strongest element, he decided. Because without life, there would be nothing.

 _Fuck, why is she crying?_ He pulled her into an embrace.

"It's a gift, yes," she said in between soft sniffles. "But it is also a curse."

 _A curse? No, no. Fire is a curse. Water is… a blessing. A cleansing. Salvation._ Zuko thought back to the Fire Sage's words from the day before. He wondered if he would be forsaken by Agni for worshiping this woman instead.

She shuddered in his arms, and he instinctively held her tighter. "Zuko, no one should have that much power over another person. I can save lives, but I can also—"

As she choked on her last words, he gently stroked her back and whispered into her hair. "Shhhhh. But you wouldn't. I _know_ you wouldn't."

Her next words were muffled, spoken into the crook of his neck where hot tears also flowed. "I don't think I would, either. But that doesn't mean I haven't wanted to. And that's the part that scares me."

* * *

Katara also had to admit that the airship ride to the South Pole scared her. They couldn't take it the whole way, only to Whaletail Island where they would pick up a boat for the remainder of their journey. For the time being, she'd pushed away the memories of the last time she'd been there. More recent memories of flying plagued her, though—when a Water Tribe assassin jumped ship and took his own life after attempting to take hers. They still didn't have answers to that particular mystery. Everyone suspected that he was from the North given their notorious track record in assigning suicide missions. _Because they have people to spare, I guess. We don't have that luxury in the South._

Katara chastised herself for such bitter thoughts. Her father had reminded her in Ba Sing Se that the war was over, and that the North was not their enemy. But if that was the case, then who would send someone to kill the daughter of the Chief of the Southern Water Tribe? Hakoda's most recent reply to them did not relay any concern on his part, but no one could deny that a conspiracy was afoot.

She leaned over the airship railing just in time to catch a glimpse of the island in the distance. That was the first time since meeting Hama she'd dared to use bloodbending—and lo and behold, it wouldn't be her last. She'd been satisfied overall at its usefulness in the medical setting. And she'd been shocked at her growing prowess with it. She didn't even need the full moon anymore.

She shivered just as strong arms enveloped her. "Seems like ages ago," Zuko rasped.

"It _was_ ages ago. At least when you think about all that's happened since then." She sighed as she leaned into his touch. _Was that when I finally allowed myself to trust him again? When he took me to find the Southern Raiders? Is that when I stopped trusting myself?_

His light kiss on her forehead left her wanting more. Perhaps she was looking for assurance that this was really real, that he was hers and she was his, and they weren't two war refugees on a quest for revenge. She followed his lead as he claimed her lips and then deepened the kiss, allowing worries and memories to fade away for the moment.

"Ahem." A guard's voice interrupted them. _There's always something. Duty. Business. Fire Lord stuff._ "I'm sorry to bother you, sir, but the control tower needs your security clearance code to confirm us for landing. I've already prepped the messenger hawk."

"Right. Of course."

Katara could still feel the warmth of his breath as he reluctantly pulled away.

* * *

For Zuko's part, it was the sight of the South Pole's icy banks coming into view that brought about a sense of uneasiness. He had a few goals in mind for this trip. One, to extend any diplomatic support he could on behalf of the Fire Nation. He knew he couldn't make up for a long history of devastation and exploitation, but he couldn't dwell on the past or ever possibly pay for the mistakes of his ancestors. He had to move forward. Secondly, he wanted to learn as much as he could about Water Tribe culture. This was a part of who Katara was and something that was important to her, yet at the same time, something he knew very little about. He vowed to change that. Third, there were actual vows—right, _that._ Wedding. Proposal. Gaining favor. Asking permission.

Chief Hakoda.

 _Can't we just, ahh, negotiate trade agreements instead?_

Zuko felt his stomach flip-flop, so he redirected his thoughts. Katara said she had this thing… about igloos. The tingly sensation from his stomach moved a little further south.

"The South!"

Zuko's eyes shot open at Ming's exclamation. It was her first visit and a chance to spend time with her lover, Bato. Theirs was an interesting story for sure, although Zuko wondered if the prisoner-guard scenario happened more often than people realized—or would be willing to admit. He also wondered what he would do if Ming decided to stay in the South Pole. _Who would make a good guard for Azula?_

The next question that struck him was, would Azula ever find love?

Not with a prison guard, that's for sure, and because his mind was all over the place today, he reined in his thoughts yet again for some Katara-in-an-igloo fantasizing.

Even though she happened to be standing right next to him. In the flesh. Or well, not _in the flesh_ like in his daydream, _unfortunately_ , but layered in furs and a thick purple parka.

"Where are all the igloos?" Katara asked, pointing a gloved finger toward their destination.

"Huh?" _No igloos definitely puts a damper on things._

Zuko hadn't been back to the South Pole since that very first time when he met Aang, Sokka, and Katara. It wasn't a day he liked to dwell on, with his ponytail-wearing, Avatar-obsessed, fifteen-year-old self in action. Needless to say, it wasn't one of his finer moments. In fact, the sooner he could put that day behind him, the better. There was one person with whom he definitely needed to make amends.

Gran Gran.

Her face was among the crowd that formed a welcoming party at the docks. She smiled brightly at Katara, but Zuko didn't think he imagined the scowl she shot in his direction.

"Wow, we have an actual harbor now?" Katara observed aloud. Her expression held an air of wonderment as they disembarked and took in the scenery, but Zuko saw the telling crease in her brow. Something wasn't right.

He quickly scanned the crowd for the Chief, but Kanna answered his question as she hooked an elbow with her granddaughter's and gave him a sideways glance. "Hakoda is in a meeting. We'll meet him at his office."

"Dad has an office?" Katara's brow was fully furrowed now.

 _An office is… good. The Water Tribe needs more… sophistication, so they can be contenders on the world scene. Katara probably doesn't like all the changes, but sometimes it's for the better…_

"Good trip, Fire Lord?" A gruff voice broke through Zuko's thoughts.

"Oh, Master Pakku. Um, hi, yes. The trip was fine, thanks. Glad to be here." Zuko was surprised to see the old waterbender here, although he knew several Northerners were assisting with the reconstruction project. _But there was something else…_

"Kanna has made such a fuss over your visit. The biggest pot of seaprunes I ever saw." Pakku then leaned over to whisper. "Just between you and me, I'm not a huge fan. But if you ever repeat that, I'll freeze your ass to that archway over there."

Zuko laughed nervously while noting there was, if fact, a huge archway marking the entrance to the village— _no, city_. He tried to catch Katara's eye, but she was busy circulating throughout their procession, meeting and greeting her fellow tribe members. No one had paid him much notice, save for Kanna's glare and Pakku's threat, and that was fine by him.

* * *

After visiting Aunt Ashuna's seal jerky shop and Master Pakku's new waterbending school, Katara turned her gaze toward the massive building in the middle of what appeared to be the town square? As a weight settled in her chest, she felt a warm hand interlock with hers.

"It's a lot different than you remember it, huh?" Zuko asked.

"It was _different_ when I came to visit last summer," she answered. "This. This is just… I don't even recognize this place. This isn't home."

"Home is where your people are, Katara. Gran Gran is here. Your father is here. I'm here?"

She thought it was equally adorable and pathetic the way his voice rose along with an eyebrow as if he really still needed to question himself like that. _Some things never change, I guess. And if Zuko needs constant reassurance, then I suppose there are worse things he could ask of me._ She smiled and squeezed his hand in response. It was the most she would risk in front of Gran Gran at least until she and Zuko had a chance to get to know each other better.

"Hey guys! So glad you're here!"

Katara narrowed her eyes at the feminine figure descending the Town Hall steps. She'd met Malina in Ba Sing Se, and now that she'd put two and two together, she knew the Northerner was responsible for the complete upheaval of her home not to mention the likelihood that this woman had her father wrapped around her finger. The idea of it literally made her feel sick.

"Hakoda suggested that we all go out to eat for dinner," Malina announced. "He's finishing up a meeting but said he would meet us there."

 _I've suddenly lost my appetite._ Katara continued to glare at her father's girlfriend.

"But what about Kanna's seaprunes?" Zuko asked. Katara wondered if it was possible to love this man any more than she did in this moment.

"There's a new restaurant that just opened up," Pakku interjected. "They serve Northern style cuisine."

"Oooh, that sounds delightful!" Malina squealed. "I'll go tell Koda now."

Katara figured it would be bad form to shoot ice daggers at her former master in the middle of town square in front of his—love interest? She realized she didn't know the status of Gran Gran and Pakku's relationship. He was _here,_ she supposed, which probably meant _something._

"Don't look so smug, you old wolfbat," Kanna sneered. "I know you don't like my cooking." With that, she whacked him on the arm and began leading the group farther down the icy pathway.

"They act like an old married couple," Zuko said under his breath. Katara nodded in agreement.

"That's because we _are_ an old married couple," Pakku said as he looked back over his shoulder at them.

Katara stopped dead in her tracks. "What!? You guys got married? When? Why didn't you invite us to the wedding?"

"Because there was no wedding, Moonflower," Kanna answered with a sly smile. "We eloped."

As they continued walking, Katara overheard Pakku say to Zuko in a hushed voice, "And if you have half a brain in that half-singed head of yours, you'll elope, too."

* * *

Zuko could tell that Katara was less-than-thrilled with their dinner arrangements. The food tasted fine to him, a lot like the Southern fare he had tried before, but various offhand comments from certain Southerners would lead him to believe that his Water Tribe palate just wasn't refined enough. The seating proved problematic, though. Only tables for four were offered at the restaurant, and since they arrived first, Zuko and Katara were seated together with Gran Gran and Pakku. When Hakoda and Malina joined them, they sat at a nearby table, close enough to see and hear each other, but not effectively carry on a conversation. Soon thereafter, Bato and Ming filled the two remaining spots.

Zuko saw that Ming looked quite nervous, so he gave her a smile and a wave. She flinched at first but then smiled back. He then realized that she was probably not used to seeing him in such a casual setting. The finer points of being Fire Lord were lost on him sometimes. He knew his father would be appalled at his lack of poise—and the fact that he was dining with Water Tribe at all—but even his mother would scold him on etiquette, he was sure of it.

"So, Fire Lord, when are you going to make my granddaughter a respectable woman?"

The directness of Kanna's comment caused him to spew his rice wine. _So much for poise and etiquette._ "Excuse me?"

"Well, she's already come of age by Water Tribe custom, and as I understand it, you're a man now by Fire Nation standards, so what are you waiting for?"

"Uhhh…"

"Gran Gran!" Katara hissed.

Zuko looked imploringly at Pakku, but the master was oh-so-conveniently avoiding his gaze. _Can I answer that we plan to elope? Would that suffice?_

"Well, you should do something soon before people start to talk," Kanna continued.

 _What in Agni's name does that mean?_ "Talk?"

" _Gran Gran!_ " Katara's face turned bright red. Zuko wished he had picked up on the implication sooner before the old woman decided to elaborate. His only salvation was that Hakoda and others weren't at the same table.

"I know you've defiled her. So, marry her and make her a respectable woman, Fire Lord."

 _Spirits. Defiled sounds so… dirty. And demoralizing._ "I'm sorry. I didn't—" He could feel his own face reddening to match Katara's.

"You _didn't?_ You mean to say that you haven't slept with my granddaughter?"

 _Fuck. Did she have to say it so loud?_ Their conversation had definitely attracted the attention of the other table now.

With so many pairs of intense blue eyes, save for Ming's, now boring into him, Zuko had no idea what to say. _So, how about those seaprunes?_

It didn't matter because Katara exploded. "We are NOT talking about this right now. Or EVER. This is personal, and it's none of your business! Do you ask Sokka these same questions? About Suki? What about Dad and Malina? None of them are married, and I can assure you there is lots of _defiling_ going on."

"Katara, dear, I'm just thinking of your reputation," was Kanna's calm answer.

"UGHHHHHHH!" Katara pushed away from the table and stormed out.

Zuko stared hard at his food even though knew he should probably say something. Pakku cleared his throat. Hakoda reached over to gently squeeze Zuko's shoulder before withdrawing his hand and simply shrugging. Malina just sat there and smirked. Bato ordered more wine, and Ming looked like she wanted to disappear under the table.

"Well, I guess I'll go after her," Kanna finally said with a drawn-out sigh of resignation.

Just as she walked past him, she shoved a shaky finger in Zuko's face. "YOU. You will not stay with Katara while you are here. You will stay with your guards on the outskirts of the city."

"But Kanna, he's royalty. And he's our guest," Hakoda appealed.

"You forget what his _royal highness_ did on his last visit here. He's lucky to have a place to stay at all."

"But—"

"It's fine," Zuko said. "I'll stay wherever. You're right. I'm lucky to be here. So, uhh, thanks for having me."

"Hmph."

Zuko let out the breath he had been holding once Kanna left the room. Bato placed another glass of wine in front of him which he downed in one gulp.

"You'll have to excuse Kanna. She's a little set in her ways," Pakku said after a few beats.

 _A little?_ Zuko coughed as the wine burned his throat. "What can I do? I wasn't sure how to answer her question. I want to be honest, but I also don't want to bring shame to your family or disrespect your values."

Pakku raised an eyebrow. "In all seriousness, Fire Lord, the Water Tribe folk are not as virtuous as we make ourselves out to be. When the winter winds blow, we know the best way to keep warm. It's why there are so many babies born in the summer."

Zuko felt the heat return to his face as he heard Hakoda suppress his laughter from the next table.

"Just be persistent," Pakku added. "That's what it took for me to gain her favor. It may take years, though. As a warning."

Zuko caught the Chief's eye who then gave him a reassuring nod. At least he had Hakoda's favor. _At least I think I do…_

"Just don't give Katara a betrothal necklace. That's my only advice."

Zuko turned back to Pakku, confused by this development. _Isn't he from the North?_ "I wasn't planning to, but why not? If you don't mind me asking…"

"It won't score you any points with Kanna. She hates the damn thing."

"But I thought you made one for her?"

" _Years_ ago. And it chased her away. And so here we are today. If you catch my drift."

Zuko nodded in understanding. "OK. Right. She doesn't like the arranged marriage thing. But surely she doesn't think that Katara and I are together for political reasons… or something like that?"

Pakku shook his head. "That's not it entirely. She doesn't like the idea of forced marriages."

"I would never force Katara to do anything she didn't want to do."

The old waterbender let out a dry chuckle. "I doubt that you could. At any rate, Kanna probably just wants you to be careful, that's all. There are certain things that may be beyond your control. That may force you to make decisions before you are ready."

Zuko clinched his jaw. This was hardly a laughing matter. But then he softened as comprehension dawned. "Wait. Is she worried about Katara getting pregnant?"

Pakku planted his elbows on the table and leaned over toward Zuko. "Fire Lord, someday when you are older, and if you do choose to have children, you will understand that one of your main goals will be to teach them not to repeat your own mistakes."

 _Ohhhh, so Kanna left the North because she was pregnant. And..._ "Master Pakku, is Katara—is she your—" Zuko stopped mid-sentence when he noticed the master's slight shake of his head followed by a jerk of his chin toward the other table.

"Yes."

"Does she know?"

"No."

* * *

 **A/N:** Why hello there, trilogy o' mine. I haven't forgotten you, but I know you've felt neglected. Sorry about that. The story is there! Some in my head, some already written, and some of it even exists in another fic called _The Dragon and the Wolf._ This chapter pretty much catches up to the timeline of that story, but while events will run concurrently, _Silver Lining_ will focus on different things. In other words, the two fics will correlate where it matters, but they won't be repetitive.

This chapter also correlates with the comic, _North and South, Part One_ , although I have to admit that it is strange for me to write concurrently with new canon releases and even about things that haven't happened, yet. I am 100% against the idea that Hakoda is a lovesick fool and not a competent leader, though, and I've gone back and forth on my suspicions about Malina. I do have a plan and direction now, one that ties in with events in Korra, even. I'll be curious to see how things play out in the comics, though.

For anyone who thinks Kanna is this sweet little old lady, sorry, but I don't see her that way. She's pretty badass, in my opinion. I also contend that she would hold a grudge until Zuko gives her reason not to (Katara did). But don't worry, she'll come around, and once you're on Gran Gran's good side, you're golden.

I've presented some of this in _The Dragon and the Wolf_ , but the Water Tribe has its fair share of family drama, too. We can't let the Fire Nation have all the fun, now can we? And Pakku as Katara's maternal grandfather... that _has_ to be canon, right? We just can't say that kind of stuff in a children's show.


	6. Questions and Answers

**A/N:** Ever since I started the trilogy, I've struggled with perspective. Essentially it's written from both Zuko and Katara's POV, but I think that gets confusing from time to time. In my other writing, I've stuck with one POV, and it's proven to be much easier to write and follow, I think. (Hey, I'm new at this fiction thing.) But I'll keep with the same style for the trilogy, yet I'll try to switch back and forth in a more predictable pattern (the last chapter as an example).

* * *

"What were you and Pakku talking about at dinner? Looked pretty serious," Hakoda asked as he escorted Zuko to his accommodations after dinner.

"Oh, uhh, nothing much." Zuko had gathered by certain gestures Pakku had made, that very few people knew he was Katara's actual grandfather.

"Oh. Well, I had hoped he was giving you tips on how to get on Kanna's good side. He'd know better than the rest of us."

"What about you? How did you get on her good side?"

"Kanna came to the South Pole when I was just a kid. It wasn't hard to be on her good side then, I guess. The real challenge came when I wanted to ask for Kya's hand in marriage."

Zuko shivered at this statement. Sure, it was getting colder with the setting sun, but he felt plenty warm. Hot, even. "Yeah. I'm glad I don't have to do that." He swallowed hard. "Ask Kanna, I mean. At least I don't think so?"

"No, no. Tradition is to ask the father. Or mother, I guess, in my case." Hakoda stopped walking, and since Zuko had no idea where he was going, he had no choice but to stop, too. He wanted to run away, though. The stage was perfectly set for him to ask his all-important question, but his nerves were completely shot from dinner.

"Zuko, is there something you wanted to ask me?" Hakoda's words came out of his mouth accompanied by puffs of steam in the frigid air.

"Uhh—can I…" _Oh, for Agni's sake, just say it!_ "C-c-can I… go hunting?"

"Huh?" The Chief raised an eyebrow in surprise.

"Hunting," Zuko repeated. "I want to learn more about Water Tribe culture while I'm here, and Sokka says hunting is a big thing, so… will you take me— _teach me_ how to hunt?"

Hakoda let out an exasperated sigh and began walking again. "Of course, Zuko. How about day after tomorrow? Maliq's newest drawings just arrived, so I need to meet with the building team tomorrow, but the next day, I should be free."

"Great. Yeah, OK. Thank you, sir." Zuko hurried to catch up with him.

"Did you meet Maliq in Ba Sing Se? He's Malina's brother," Hakoda continued.

"Yes, I did."

"Well, after King Kuei's wedding, he went back to the North for a brief stint. When I got your letter about the suicide assassin, I sent word to him. He's agreed to do some investigating for us while he's up there. I just wanted to let you know."

"OK, thanks. Yeah, that was… crazy."

"You really think he was trying to kill Katara? No offense, but it seems like the Fire Lord would be a more likely target. The Water Tribes have their differences, sure, but you were traveling through the Earth Kingdom after such a public event."

Zuko tried to think back to the incident on the train. So much had happened _since_ then it seemed. "It's possible. Everything was such a blur. He did say he had a message from you, and he appeared to be aiming for Katara, but I could be mistaken."

Hakoda nodded. "Of course. And one of your guards saved her?"

"Yes."

"Well, I wish more of the apartment buildings were finished so we could offer your guards a better place to stay. Unfortunately, it's just the igloos for now." He stopped abruptly and made a sweeping gesture with his arm toward a large encampment of igloos positioned at the outskirts of the city. Where Kanna had banned Zuko apparently.

To an igloo of all places.

At Zuko's crestfallen expression, Hakoda said, "They're really not so bad. The ice blocks cut the wind better than you'd think. And each one is stocked with plenty of warm fur blankets. Let us know if you need anything, OK?"

 _I need Katara._ "OK, thanks."

* * *

The memory of Hama and bloodbending had made her feel sick. The overwhelming amount of change that had taken place in her village— _no, city?_ —also made her feel sick. The idea of Malina manipulating her father definitely made her feel sick. And Northern-style food for dinner with a side of Gran Gran's meddling was what finally did her in.

And of course, Gran Gran would be the one gently rubbing circles on her back as she retched in the snow outside the restaurant.

Just as Katara was recovering, the old woman put the icing on the cake when she said in a sickeningly sweet voice, "Oh, my little moonflower. I had a hunch that you were pregnant."

At this, Katara dry heaved. _So that's what this is all about._

"No, Gran Gran. I'm a waterbender."

"Yes, I know there's a trick you can do, but it's not always foolproof, you know."

Katara wiped her mouth and cleared her throat. "No, I mean, I'm a healer. I would know if I'm pregnant or not. Also, I take medicine. Birth control."

"Oh. Well then. That's _one_ advantage of living in a more modernized country, I suppose."

Katara could tell from Gran Gran's tone just exactly what she thought of this so-called _modernized country._ "Gran Gran, the Fire Nation is not a bad place. And Zuko is not a bad person. Will you please give him a chance?"

"Katara, the Fire Nation has ravaged the world in war my entire life. They have taken so much from us—from me personally—and you, too. Forgive me if I find it difficult to welcome the Fire Lord not only as a visitor here but as a friend? Or potential member of our family? Have you not even considered—"

"Gran Gran, the war is over. And things are changing in the Fire Nation. I've seen it with my own eyes. And Zuko, he's changed, too. But he was never the enemy. Not really. If anything, he was just as much a victim as the rest of us. I used to blame him for Mom's death, but that's hardly fair. He was just a child, then."

The elder's face darkened as her voice deepened. "It's in their blood, dear. Fear. Hatred."

Katara shuddered as her bloodbending came to mind. "No, Gran Gran. Fear and hatred is in all of us."

* * *

 **A/N:** This is a short chapter, but I wanted to get these two key conversations posted because they tie in with events in _The Dragon and the Wolf._ Speaking of, I have decided that I need to finish that story before I continue writing this one. Right now, chapter one of Dragon picks up with Zuko asking Hakoda **the question** , so if you haven't read it, then head over there and enjoy. I'm 16 chapters deep into what was originally intended to be a one-shot companion piece.

If you're a trilogy follower from the beginning, then bless you! And maybe put this story on alert? Because I WILL come back to it, I promise! (Part of it is already written, actually.) The South Pole saga that is outlined in the Dragon fic is only a small portion of what will happen here, but I have to finish that first to figure out which parts are plot-relevant to help move this story forward. I've written myself into a mind-boggling mess, in other words! (A mess for me, hopefully a captivating story for you. Or at least one that makes sense, anyway.)


	7. On the Cutting Edge

**A/N:** In this chapter, I introduce Siku and Sura, two girls from the South Pole who are from the North and South comic series. Some of their characterization is canon, some of it is not. Chapters 1 &2 of _The Dragon and the Wolf_ correlate with this chapter and provide a detailed account of Zuko's conversation with Hakoda while hunting. My goal is to have that fic be complementary but also able to stand alone from this one (and vice versa with this one flowing from _Darkness Before Dawn_ and _Rising Tide_ ). Because the dragon story is told from Zuko's perspective, I think the parallel story told from Katara's perspective will appear here... mostly. (Per the style of the trilogy, though, I go back-and-forth between the two main characters' POV.)

* * *

"Zuko?" Katara meandered through the igloo encampment, noting the scenery felt more familiar than the newly erected apartments with their narrow hallways and confining walls. But there were too many igloos situated together, which also felt restricting. These were supposed to be the symbols of freedom—growth and development. Katara wondered if they were now fighting a war of a different kind. _What must we lose to gain all this?_

"Zuko!" Her voice carried the same bite as the crisp morning air.

"He's not here, my lady." Ming emerged from one of the igloos.

"Oh? Did he say where he was going?"

"He went somewhere with Chief Hakoda. Hunting, I think."

Katara folded her arms across her chest. "Hmmph."

"Is there something I can help you with Lady Katara?" Ming asked.

"Oh no, thank you. I just—hey, are you staying out here, too?"

"Of course. All of the Fire Nation guard is here. Along with the construction workers from the North. It must be where all the visitors stay," Ming answered with a slight shrug.

 _Visitors? Or… foreigners._ Even though they had only just arrived yesterday, Katara could already sense the tension—the frigid air was thick with it. "But I thought you would stay with Bato?"

"Oh, no ma'am. It wouldn't be proper."

"Of course." _Gran Gran and her sudden sense of high morals would agree with you there._

Katara regarded the Fire Nation guard for a few seconds before resigning. "Very well, then. If you see Zuko, would you tell him I came looking for him?"

"As you wish, my lady," Ming said with a bow.

With each step taken, drudging through snow, Katara's flurry of thoughts blew colder. _The Fire Nation is so dignified and formal. It really does make the Water Tribe look like barbarians especially when we treat our guests like trash, tossing them to the outskirts of the city. It's all the Northerners' fault. All these walls and buildings divide us and disrupt our way of living. They say it is a sign of working together, but even still, we are separated from each other._

In her state of storming, she nearly crashed into a bundle of purple fabric accented by tousled auburn tresses. It was partly the hair that seemed off about her father's girlfriend. That and perhaps the vibrant gemlike color of her eyes. The purple parka was familiar, though— _too familiar._ She eyed Malina's suspiciously but then decided that it had a different design than her mother's. The sudden rush of memories came unbidden, though, and struck Katara with a pang of longing and sadness. _I bet Mom wouldn't like all the changes, either…_

If Malina noticed Katara's barrage of multiple emotions in the span of mere seconds, she didn't show it. "Katara! I'm so glad I found you!" she said in her usual chipper tone.

"Oh yeah?" _Can't say I feel the same…_

"The boys have gone hunting, so I thought you might want to have lunch together. To get to know each other better? I know it must be awkward—"

"You don't know anything," Katara snapped.

"Um, right. That's what I'm saying. I _want_ to know, Katara. How about we talk about it over… seaprunes? That's your favorite? I know that much, I think." Malina raised her eyebrows and bit her bottom lip in a way that Katara thought looked stupidly adorable. She knew her father better than that, but if Malina _could_ win him over with looks alone...

Katara sighed. _She's trying. I should be nice. For Dad, at least._ "I, uhh, thanks for the invite. Really. But I told Master Pukku I would visit his new waterbending school, so I was just going there now."

"Oh, hmm. Sure." Malina smirked.

 _OK, that look is not so cute._ "What?"

"Well, you're headed in the wrong direction. His school is that way."

Katara looked past to where Malina was pointing and let out a noise of frustration. "Everything is so confusing around here!"

"I'd be happy to show you around sometime," Malina called after her.

Katara seethed at the fact that this woman would know more about the South Pole than she did. Maybe waterbending would help release some of this homecoming stress.

That wasn't likely, however, since she found a very frustrated Pakku running sequences with two young girls. She observed the hesitance in their bending before clearing her throat to announce her presence.

"Ah, Master Katara," Pakku said, visibly relieved at the diversion from what appeared to be a painfully unproductive lesson. Maybe it was because he wasn't accustomed to teaching girls, Katara wondered. Especially ones so young.

"I'd like you to meet my newest apprentices, Siku and Sura." He made a sweeping gesture with one arm while collecting his bending water in the other.

Two sets of wide blue eyes just stared at her. Then, _splash._ Their water hit the floor.

"Hi there, " Katara started. "So you're waterbenders? From the South?"

The older slowly nodded. The younger's lip trembled.

 _What is the deal? This is exciting!_ "That's great news! I thought I was the last Southern waterbender! But now that means there are _three_ of us!"

Sura burst into tears and buried her head into the thick fabric of her sister's tunic. Katara shot Pakku a questioning look, but he only rolled his eyes and mumbled something about _being too emotional._

"S-s-sorry," Siku said. "She gets this way sometimes."

"Well, don't let Master Pakku scare you." Katara cast him a sideways glance, then smiled at the girls. "All he really asks is that you work hard and try your best, so—"

"That's not it. She's not scared of him," Siku explained. "It's the waterbending itself."

Katara exchanged another look of confusion with the master who offered a half-shrug and said, "This is the most they've said so far. Their father brought them here from an outlying village. He said their family has tried to ignore or discourage their gifts for many years, but decided that with the end of the war, their lives were no longer in danger, and they should be trained instead."

"Oh." Katara glanced back at the pair. Siku was now staring hard at the ground, and Sura still shuddered into her shoulder.

"Can I have a moment with them?" Katara asked.

"Take all the time you need." With a wave of his hand, Pakku transferred his bending water over to her.

Katara deposited the water into a nearby basin and cautiously approached the girls. "So… no one else in your family is a waterbender?"

Sura shook her head furiously, but there was something in Siku's expression that Katara found curious.

"It's OK… Master Pakku and your father are right. There is no longer a threat to waterbenders in the South Pole. The Fire Nation doesn't come here anymore to k-k-i, uhh, I mean capture us. In fact, there are some visiting right now on peaceful terms. They are very nice. I could take you to meet someone if that would help you feel better." _Ming would be perfect for this. She is so gracious and very approachable._

Sura continued her protest with even her pony-pigtails shaking in objection. Siku remained statuesque, still fixated on some point on the floor in front of her.

 _Hmm. New tactic._ "OK, then. Let's work on some extra special waterbending moves. I'll teach you a few tricks that even Master Pakku doesn't know."

No response.

 _This is harder than convincing Toph to take a bath._ Katara crouched down to Sura's eye level, surprised that the girl would even look at her. "Listen. We're the last benders of our tribe. We owe it to our people to keep the southern style alive. I can't do it by myself. I need your help."

"We're not supposed to!" Sura finally blurted out. "Mama said it's a curse!"

 _"Wha-at?"_ Whatever reason she suspected for them to be afraid, it was _not_ that.

At this, Siku broke down into tears. "It's because of our grandmother. She's in a Fire Nation prison for murder and kidnapping. And Mama is sick, some blood disease. She says it is our family's curse because of our grandmother's perversion of waterbending."

Katara felt her own blood burn with a feverish ache and prickle with an uneasy chill all at the same time. As if it were happening right then and there. _Hama._

She swallowed hard and tried to mask her fear, though, for the girls' sake. "Has your mother seen a healer? Surely there is a hospital here in the city?" Her own admission of her home as a city was unsettling, but it was the first time she'd considered how certain advancements would be quite resourceful.

"No, ma'am. There are no healers in the South Pole," Siku said with a sniffle.

"There are now," Katara replied.

* * *

Hakoda and Zuko had been unproductive on their hunting trip—as in, they didn't make any kills. Zuko was grateful to be alive, though, and to have survived asking his all important question. Hakoda did drill him a little about why he wanted to marry Katara, but in the end, Zuko discovered that he'd had the chief's blessing all along, although he wasn't sure what he'd done to deserve it.

Kanna's approval, however, was a different matter. She would be a difficult lychee nut to crack especially after yielding nothing from the day's hunt. Hakoda had mentioned that bringing in his fattest kill was how he received her blessing for Kya's hand in marriage. It made perfect sense. A man should demonstrate his ability to provide for a wife. Zuko also understood the need to perform in order to gain someone's favor. But oddly enough, Hakoda didn't seem to require this.

Zuko was ready to count the day as a success and spend the rest of it with Katara. But Kanna had other plans apparently. Due to their _un_ successful hunting trip, Hakoda and Zuko landed themselves in the kitchen responsible for cooking dinner that night. Zuko thought _success_ was a matter of perspective here. He'd accomplished a lot, gaining confidence in his standing with the chief. He should quit while he's ahead—at least for today—especially since Hakoda took on the cooking task quite begrudgingly.

 _He looks just as intimidating with a knife as he does a spear. Oh fuck, now he's holding two! OK, focus. There's fish. And some unidentifiable vegetables. What if I mess up the recipe? Then Kanna will hate me forever. Who am I kidding? She'll never forgive me. I'm the face of the enemy. The chief welcomes me so easily, but what if he knew the truth? Would he look at me differently? Wait… why is he staring at me like that?_

"Hey, you can visit La La Land later," Hakoda barked. "I'm about to give you a filet knife, so a little presence of mind would be good right now."

"Oh. Right. Sorry sir." Zuko positioned a fish on the cutting board to show he was ready.

"We wouldn't want you to get another unnecessary scar because you weren't paying attention."

Zuko's knife wielding hand froze in mid-slice while he used his other to brace himself against the table. He wasn't sure if the sharp intake of air came from his mouth or the chief's. The pressure in his chest would suggest the need to breathe.

"I'm so sorry, Zuko. That came out wrong. I—"

Zuko carefully set the knife down, let out a deep breath, and wiped his brow with back of his sleeve. "No, no. I'm sure if I had been paying attention, I would have fewer scars… _sir_." He clipped the last word despite his attempt at keeping an even tone. _Please don't…_

Hakoda's pained expression spoke to his regret. "I only meant that it is _unnecessary_ for a father to strike his son. That's not punishment, that's—"

"Who said it was my father?" Zuko snapped. _I can't… do this… right now._

Hakoda set down his own knife and sighed. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have assumed. Your sister, then?"

"No sir."

Zuko felt Hakoda's stare as if those ice blue eyes were piercing him, _freezing_ him. It was enough to make the scar in question burn with a feverish ache and prickle with an uneasy chill all at the same time. He willed this conversation to end quickly so he could still call the day a success. _I don't want you to know my weakness… my fear._

"That's good to hear. Families should love and trust each other," Hakoda said finally.

"Yes sir."

"And… I trust you, Zuko," the chief added.

Zuko nodded in response, but even though he heard the words, a different voice captured his thoughts. _Trust is for fools. Fear is the only reliable way._

"What was that?" Hakoda asked.

 _Shit, did I say it out loud?_ "Uhh, nothing, sir." He closed his eyes, hoping everything, all of it, would just go away. _Azula always lies. Azula always lies._

"Are you two cooking or jabbering in here?" Katara interjected, her voice causing Zuko to jump in both surprise and relief. Hakoda was still looking at him with an odd expression—concerned, caring, _fatherly?_

Katara noticed. "This conversation looks a little too deep for chopping vegetables. Somebody might get hurt." Zuko winced at her comment.

"How about I take over from here?" She smiled and nudged him with her elbow.

"You s-s-sure? Won't that make Kanna mad?"

" _Gran Gran_ is on her nightly stroll with Pakku." She then leaned over and whispered in his ear. "And Malina is driving me crazy, so go keep her company, will ya?"

"Uhhhh…" _How am I supposed to do that?_

* * *

"Hey Dad, what were you guys talking about?" Katara hoped it was something along the lines of marriage, although she doubted her father would tell her if it was.

"Family," Hakoda said simply while resuming his place and pace at the cutting board.

 _That's kinda like marriage._ "Oh?" Katara used her bending to wash the vegetables, then set about chopping them into slices for roasting.

"He's uh, very sensitive about the scar, I take it?"

Katara's knife wielding hand froze in mid-slice. "You _asked_ him about it? Da-ad!"

"I didn't mean to, it just kinda… came up! And I didn't ask… I just assumed, and I was wrong. So… was it some kind of training accident? Is he ashamed because someone with his status is not supposed to make such a mistake? I just sense a lot of… shame."

 _Ah, so Zuko must not have told him about the Agni Kai._ "He _IS_ ashamed of it, Dad, so would you please never ever bring it up again?"

"Of course. I'm sorry."

Katara really hoped her father wasn't trying to scare Zuko away, even if inadvertently. Or worse, was he putting him to some kind of test to judge his worthiness to marry her? Surely not…

"It must not have been recent then."

"What?" Jumbled thoughts and rhythmic chopping had momentarily distracted Katara from their conversation.

"You like La La Land, too, huh?"

She quirked a brow at him.

"Never mind... Zuko's scar," Hakoda continued. "It must not be recent, because otherwise you would have healed it. Have you tried healing it? Malina says the spirit water from the oasis in the North has special properties, so maybe she could help you get some. Her brother, Maliq, knows Chief Arnook quite well, in fact."

Katara slammed her knife down on the table. " _I_ know Chief Arnook quite well! So I don't _need_ Malina's help!"

Hakoda pinched the bridge of his nose, and the gesture made Katara gasp _. Zuko does that, too!_

"I'm sorry, Skeet. I do sometimes forget that you're not the little girl I left behind. You're a young woman now. And you've traveled the world. _Of course_ you know Chief Arnook. And I'm sure you've done everything you can for Zuko, too. I know you love him, and he loves you."

Katara saw that fatherly look again, but his words didn't register past his audacity to use her annoying childhood nickname. _No matter what he says, he will always see me as the little girl he left behind._

And just like the unexpected wave of grieve that hit her earlier, a renewed fear of abandonment overtook her now. _He just LEFT… and when he finally came back, he took home away, too._

She heard the voices calling after her as she ran out of Gran Gran's hut—her father's, one of command and concern, of course, Zuko, who sounded frantic and confused, then Malina, acting like she cares. _UGH._ Katara even brushed past Gran Gran and Pakku just returning from their evening stroll, but she didn't look back.

She didn't really know where her feet were taking her until she got there. Siku and Sura's home. An inland village close to where the tundra meets the forest.

Hama's village.


	8. Fight or Flight

Darkness had long since claimed the icy terrain by the time Katara reached the outskirts of the village which was nothing more than a small encampment of sealskin tents and yak-hide huts illuminated by scattered campfires. Katara had known nothing of its existence until the previous summer when she visited here with her father. He told her that the group broke away from the main tribe during his father's rule. When he became chief, Hakoda would make periodic visits to assure them of his support. With the war's end and promise of progress and restoration, he had hoped they would rejoin the larger tribe in the more centralized city. Being closer to the harbor, connected to the outside world, would be advantageous, he had said.

Katara slowed her pace and took in the scene with a strange sense of fondness, almost _a longing_. It reminded her of the way things used to be—of _home._ She didn't blame them. She wouldn't want to leave, either. Besides, all the port ever brought them was pain—ships full of soldiers with fists of fire and smoke that poured down like rain.

Of course, all of that had changed. She had to believe it, too. Because now _she_ was the one who arrived by ship. Fire and water, progress and restoration. Connected to the outside world.

 _Maybe none of this feels like home anymore because… it isn't._

She had stopped walking by this point, unsure of why she came here in the first place. A dull ache had settled behind her eyes, and a slight pounding in her ears kept her from hearing the approaching footsteps. But whoever gripped her wrists, pulled her arms behind her back, and placed cold metal to her throat would soon regret it. Because another sensation coursed through her blood.

The moon was full.

But before she could unleash an entire snowbank on her captor, a voice broke through her pulsing rage.

"Kian, let her go! That's the chief's daughter!"

Her release was immediate. Katara stumbled forward toward the speaker, then shot a glare back at the young man who held his guard, blue eyes and blade both flashing in the dark.

"I'm sorry, do I know you?" She summoned some snow to soothe the sore spots on her wrists before they left a mark. She didn't want to have to explain bruises to Zuko.

A young woman's face came into view. "You're… a healer!"

Katara sighed. Now she remembered. "Y-y-yeah. That's why I'm here."

* * *

Dinner was all sorts of awkward without Katara. Zuko felt like he should say _something_ to Hakoda after their conversation in the kitchen. _Uhh, thank you? I'm sorry? I trust you, too… I think?_

Except that the chief's edginess from earlier had sharpened significantly, although not directed at him, thankfully. There was definitely some tension between Hakoda and Kanna. Malina spoke in an unnatural sing-song tone about random unrelated topics which only added to the discomfort. And Pakku may be a seasoned warrior, but he was seemingly dead set on dodging domestic conflict at all costs.

Zuko understood, though. He'd seen his share of warfare on the homefront. Except this family fought differently. Less fiery, more cold. Less explosive, more cautious. And while Zuko did _not_ like the idea of Agni Kais to settle an argument, he thought he might prefer quick and easy over the stewing and brewing.

Then again, he'd never been in an Agni Kai that was quick and easy. Nor did it settle anything for that matter. He reached up to touch his scar but quickly withdrew his hand when he saw Hakoda was watching.

After dinner, Pakku grabbed Zuko's elbow and led him a few paces away from the others. "Would you be up for a spar, Fire Lord? I haven't had a decent opponent in ages."

"Oh, uhh, sure. But what about Katara?"

"What about her?"

 _Where did she go?_ "She'd be a good opponent?"

"Well, I'm sure she can kick _your_ ass. But she's predictable… especially since I taught her everything she knows," Pakku said with a smirk.

 _Oh, I seriously doubt that._ "Sure. You're on."

Fighting Pakku was nothing like sparring with Katara. Because she's _anything_ but predictable, combining traditional moves—much like the ones Pakku now executed flawlessly—with flowing motions punctuated by erratic bursts, almost like firebending. Pakku was clearly a master, though, strong and accurate and ultimately _very_ predictable. Zuko was a little out of practice, but he was agile and fast.

The fight drew a small audience, and because of that, Zuko let Pakku win. He knew a way to do this without his opponent knowing. He'd often lose on purpose and early on when fighting Azula in their younger years because he'd learned the stakes would be much higher if he didn't. And he'd throw fights with Katara occasionally, too, but she absolutely couldn't know it. She wouldn't stand for it. But he could tell when she needed to dominate, to overpower him. There was some underlying symbolism there. They were equally matched _now_ , but they hadn't always been.

 _This_ fight was symbolic, too, in a sense. That Water Tribe and Fire Nation were now equal on the global scene, but the pursuit of peace didn't erase all the pain and suffering from the past. By his own country's code of honor, Zuko couldn't surrender. But he could lose and acknowledge his worthy opponent. He knew a simple sparring victory wouldn't cover the gamut of grievances his nation caused at the South Pole, but he hoped it would demonstrate his humility and openness in coming here.

* * *

"Why did you come here?" The question came out like a hiss from across the hut. Kian, the tribe's guard, and his sister, Mika, exchanged nervous glances.

Katara shivered. Maybe it was her imagination, but the voice was eerily similar along with certain features silhouetted by smoke and shadows. "I—" she croaked.

"Speak up, girl! We don't take kindly to unannounced visitors after dark!" The woman had been introduced as one of the tribal elders, but Katara knew exactly who she was.

She cleared her throat. "I'm sorry. My name is Katara. I met Siku and Sura today at waterbending school. They said you were sick, and I'm a healer, so I thought I could—"

"The Northern style of healing focuses on chi flow, girl. I assure you my problem has nothing to do with my chi."

She was right. By encouraging enhanced chi flow, a waterbending healer actually helps the body heal itself. Everyone has the power within to overcome and recover. It's tapping that power that presents a challenge for most people.

But Katara didn't plan to access the woman's chi flow. She had a different method in mind and even the full moon to aid her. She just couldn't tell this woman what she was doing, of course.

"Well, actually, I've trained in medicine all over the world. I can… use your chi to assess your problem and maybe suggest a treatment you haven't tried, yet?" She'd also learned a little about auras, the outward expression of one's chi energy. This woman's contributed to the darkness she was shrouded in— _hopelessness._

"Don't you think I've tried everything!?" the elder snapped. "It is _not_ a problem. It is a curse."

Katara realized she'd seen this type of negative energy before with Zuko. When he thought he was doomed to become his father, forced to live that legacy, and carry on that curse. He had even called it a sickness at one point. _So how did he overcome?_

The first time Katara sensed that Zuko had found hope was when he met Lee. Because it was the first time he considered the possibility of a future untouched by Ozai's influence. When he discovered he had a choice... and a responsibility. _Hmm. It's worth a shot._

"Siku and Sura are very talented," she started. "You must be very proud."

There was a hitch in the woman's breath at this unexpected turn in the conversation.

"I think… as the last few Southern waterbenders, we have an important choice to make," Katara continued. "We can be strong and courageous and carry on our tradition. Or we can remain victims to our history of fear and weakness. I know what future I want for myself and the tribe. What do you want for your children?"

There was a rustle of fabric as the feeble woman pushed herself to a seated position. "How _dare_ you speak as if you know me. As if you know what my family has been through. _Of course_ the girls are talented. They do not come from a history of weakness as you suggest."

 _Right. Their history is one of great power. Horrible, unspeakable, unlimited power._

Katara thought better than to mention that she did, in fact, know something about their family—or _someone_ , rather. "I-I'm sorry. I just wanted to help. I shouldn't have come here."

Tears stung her eyes and wind whipped at her cheeks as she brushed past curious villagers in her haste to leave. She made it to the outer ring of tents before she felt a soft grip on her shoulder.

"Katara?"

It was Mika with Kian standing just behind her, both wearing grim expressions.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to—"

"There are others," Mika interjected. "Who are sick. Hanna said to kill her if the curse spread to others… and to kill the girls, too. So, we haven't told her."

 _Hanna? Of course her name would even sound the same._ Katara shuddered, her vision now blurring with the emotion she was trying to hold back.

"Siku and Sura's father took them to the city for their own safety. The waterbending lessons are just a cover, actually," Mika explained.

Kian stepped forward. "Do you really think it's a curse?" he asked.

"No. I don't." Katara said. _But it could be contagious._

"Would you come take a look at our father, then?"

* * *

"Do you always invite your opponent to tea after you defeat them?" Zuko eyed Pakku over the rim of his cup as he slowly sipped the steaming drink. It was nothing like the brews his uncle made, but he liked its herbal flavor.

"You know what they say, when you can't beat them, poison them," Pakku said with a sly smile.

Zuko coughed and pounded a fist to his chest where the tea's warmth had just settled. "B-b-but you beat me, sir?"

"Did I?" Pakku raised an eyebrow and lifted his own teacup.

 _Oh shit. He knows._

"Tell me, Fire Lord. Had we finished the fight properly, who do you think would have really won?"

Zuko swallowed, his throat suddenly dry. "I-I don't know. Probably you. It's been a long day, and I'm tired, so—"

"That's not the reason you threw the fight. If I didn't know any better, I'd say it was to protect an old's man pride or maybe even get in good with your girlfriend's family, but that's not it, either. It was a diplomatic move, and well played, I might add." Pakku's gray-blue eyes softened, and the hue reminded Zuko of misty mornings at sea.

"Uhh, yes sir. Thanks."

"So, answer my question truthfully. Who do you think would have won in the end?" The waterbender paused to stroke his beard. "We can go fight again and find out."

"No, no. That won't be necessary." _I really am tired._ "Uhh... I still think it would have been you, sir."

"And why is that?"

"Because we're in your territory. You have all this water and ice at your command. My only source is my inner fire."

"Ahh, but we supposedly had home advantage when the Fire Nation attacked us. What happened then?"

Zuko shifted uncomfortably in his seat. "Uhh... you were outnumbered, sir."

"Ahh, I see. So what you're saying is that people do best when they are _in their element_ , so to speak. And that strength comes in numbers, eh?"

"Yeah, I guess so."

"And alone, you are only as strong as your inner fire, as you put it."

"Right."

"So let this be a lesson in Water Tribe culture, Fire Lord. We are a communal people. No man stands alone. Even fire needs air and fuel to burn."

"Oh-okay."

Pakku leaned in close enough for Zuko to smell the herbs on his breath. "My point is, it is OK to need people. A solo ship is lost at sea, but a fleet has purpose."

Zuko allowed himself to breathe and nodded in response. He knew what it meant to sail solo for a purpose, even if it was a lost cause. He'd never really had a fleet— _a family_ , until now.

Then the old waterbender set down his cup with a surprising _clank._ "But there IS such a thing as Water Tribe pride. Don't EVER pull a stunt like that again. Next time we fight to the end."


	9. Flight of the Phoenix

**A/N:** This chapter is told entirely from Katara's perspective with the next one told from Zuko's. Both chapters will have Kanna giving a lot of Water Tribe backstory, too. Sorry, but it's the only way to set the stage for certain events. As far as setting goes, I imagine the South Pole to be less like Antarctica and more like the subarctic regions that span Northern Canada or Russia. So there are the icy banks near the water, what I've called the "tundra," which is also very icy and limits vegetative growth, and then the "boreal" forest. I mainly contend that there are trees in the Avatar world's South Pole because we see them in Korra when they make the trek to the spirit portal.

* * *

"It's the moon spirit! She's come to save us all!" The frail man marveled at Katara's glowing hands. Then his widened eyes flashed with fear. "Or she's come to judge us! Have mercy, moon spirit!"

The force of his flailing arms sent Katara's healing water to the floor where a thick pelt covering immediately soaked it up. She let out a _huff_ in frustration.

"Please forgive our father," Mika said. "Hallucinations are part of the illness." Kian nodded in agreement from where he stood in the doorway of their family's small hut.

"It's OK." Katara sighed, refocusing. "I've met the moon spirit, actually. She's quite lovely."

But before she could replenish from her waterskin, the man reached out and gripped her arm. "But have you met _The Phoenix?_ "

Katara tilted her head to the side. "Uhhh—" _Ozai?_

"She defied the moon spirit and betrayed us all!" he wailed.

 _She?_

"It's the curse of the fish moon!" He rasped while pointing a shaky finger upward. Katara's gaze followed, expecting to find the moon shining down on them, but the darkened roof canopy obstructed the view. She felt it so strongly, though, as if she _could_ see it.

"I can't take it anymore!" Kian stepped forward suddenly and clasped a hand over his father's nose and mouth. The man jolted violently, then slowly relaxed and drifted off to sleep.

"What was that!?" Katara exclaimed.

Kian held out his palm to reveal a piece of cloth. "Anesthetic. Now you can focus on your examination."

She folded her arms across her chest. "Rrrrright. Let me start by asking a few questions. Do you know what he's talking about? The fish moon?"

"The hallucinations usually happen at the full moon. Last month he ranted about the blood moon. Before that it was the hunger moon. Before that… I don't remember. I'm not sure what it any of it means, if anything. Because this isn't the fish moon, it's the egg moon, right?"

"I think so. The egg moon _IS_ cursed, though. The others, too."

Katara hadn't thought much about the full moons and their meanings recently, but they did hold significance in the Water Tribe. The egg moon warned against conception during its cycle because babies born in the middle of winter were less likely to survive. The blood moon was also a death omen—in the South Pole, it announced an impending enemy attack. The hunger moon was a mixed blessing, its presence symbolized the end of winter with promise of growth on the horizon, but also meant the depletion of resources when many would go hungry. Some would not live to see spring's first buds or hear the heralding birdsong of the crow moon.

Kian cleared his throat, and Katara looked back to find two pairs of expectant eyes staring at her. "Oh. Sorry. Umm, how long has he been this way?"

"Since the end of the war," Mika answered. "Ever since—" She paused when Kian gave a slight shake of his head.

"Since what? Any information you can give me is helpful. Even if it is about moon meanings. I've probably seen or heard stranger things."

"Doubt it," Kian grumbled.

Mika drew in deep breath. "Well, Hanna thinks the curse came over the village when we received a message from the Fire Nation. Her mother had been arrested for... crimes that would offend the moon spirit. Of course, that wasn't the Fire Nation's charge, only Hanna's interpretation of it. There was going to be a trial, and the case was difficult because she had been a prisoner of war. The Fire Lord was trying to make amends, he—"

"The Fire Lord?" _I told Zuko about Hama. Why would he not tell me about this?_

"Probably not the Fire Lord himself, sis," Kian interjected. "It was signed by a former war general."

 _Oh. Iroh then._

"OK, OK. But you still don't think it's a curse," Katara redirected. "So is there anything else that happened around that time that could be the cause?"

"The men came back from the war."

 _Ohhhhh, maybe they brought the disease with them?_

"Did you fight, Kian?" she asked.

"No. _Our_ men didn't go to war. This village has remained isolated and neutral since it broke away. The original dispute was over war tactics, I believe. Hanna could tell you more."

"Uhh, no, that's fine. I think I have enough information to do the exam now."

Except the exam yielded very little information other than what she already knew. There was a foreign substance in the blood causing contamination. It was attacking the central nervous system, causing paranoia and hallucinations. Lack of muscle coordination and eventual deterioration would be next which is what she suspected had happened to Hanna since the woman couldn't bear her own weight anymore.

"And what was on that cloth? The anesthetic?" she asked.

"A medicine derived from seaweed," Kian answered.

This raised an alarm according to her Fire Nation medical training, but even though overuse could become problematic, she knew it wasn't related. At this point, all Katara could tell was that the contaminant was _not_ liquid. She could move it _with_ the blood, but she could not move the substance itself. Therefore she could not bend it out of a person's system. She could take a blood sample for further testing, but she would really need the equipment and expertise back at the Fire Nation hospital. When she saw the weary looks on Kian and Mika's faces, almost entranced by the blue glow of her healing water, she figured now was not a good time to suggest any invasive procedures.

Katara slowly withdrew her hands and recorked her waterskin. "So… there is something I can detect in the blood. But I wouldn't call it a curse. It's more like… a poison. Normally the body can flush out toxins on its own, so make sure he drinks plenty of water and watch what he eats or what he comes in contact with so maybe we can find the source. I'll do some research and get back with you."

"So, you can't heal him?" Mika frowned and began fidgeting frantically. "B-b-but, you're a healer!"

"I can't isolate the poison from his blood! It's not… water based, whatever it is. If I could, then I would pull it out of his system. I'm sorry. It probably came from the environment, so look for patterns. Things that your father and Hanna have been exposed to that others haven't. I'll come back when I have more information, OK?"

"But—"

"Mika, let her go." Kian jerked his chin toward the door, and Katara took this as her cue to leave.

Once outside the hut, she overhead Kian say, "She's not a healer, Mika. Not like the Northerners anyway."

"What do you mean?" The desperation in his sister's voice was heartbreaking.

"Didn't you hear what she said? She's not looking at chi flow, she's testing his blood."

"Yeah, so? That's where the problem is, isn't it?"

"She's doing it, Mika. The bloodbending. Like Hama."

Katara ran away as fast as she could.

* * *

"They're gone _again_!?" After a restless night filled with echoes of cackling laughter and flying over neverending fields of wilted firelillies, Katara _really_ wanted to see Zuko.

"Of course, dear. Morning is the best time for fishing," Gran Gran replied.

Katara did not miss the tilt of her grandmother's head toward the pile of clothing on the floor. Yesterday she had protested the idea of menial chores, but the task of mending would help take her mind off things, she supposed.

"They have the blessing of the fish moon, too," Gran Gran added.

Katara nearly poked herself with a needle. "What was that?"

"The fish moon. It's what we call this moon cycle in the North, when the fish are spawning and ripe for the catch."

"Oh."

"So, where did you go last night?"

Katara recognized the casual tone of masked worry in her grandmother's voice. "Out."

"Hmmm." Kanna pressed her lips together, clearly unsatisfied with the answer. "Well, you should be careful on the water at night, moonflower. It's swarming season for the tiger shark. The females can be unforgiving when they're in heat."

 _She thinks she knows everything._ "I didn't go out on the water, Gran Gran."

"Oh? Be careful here on land, too, my dear. There have been sightings of a snow leopard in the forest. She is a fierce nocturnal predator who shows no mercy."

Katara ignored how such words struck her as familiar and foreboding. "Well, I also have the blessing of the full moon. It's when my bending is most powerful, so I'm fine. No need to worry."

"You can never be too careful with that, either, Katara. Great power can be a blessing, but it can also be a curse."

 _How does Gran Gran know everything?_

She folded a tunic a few times under Kanna's watchful gaze before finally speaking. "I went to the village. The one just on the edge of the forest."

A shadow overtook the elder's face. "Hmm. I see. A different type of danger resides there. Far more unforgiving than a female tiger shark. And more fierce than a snow leopard on the prowl."

Katara had never entertained the idea that her grandmother could possibly know Hama, but she was quite aware that they weren't talking about an animal threat here. Which was why Kanna's next words came as a surprise.

"Therein lies the legacy of _The Phoenix_ … although some say it's a curse."

Kian and Mika's father had used the same ominous words that never ceased to send chills down Katara's spine. _But we're not talking about the former Fire Lord, are we?_

There had been a time long ago when Gran Gran referred to Katara as the spirit of the phoenix, during a period of her life Katara had tried to forget. She didn't know what it meant then, and with everything she knew now, she didn't want to have anything to do with it anymore. _Maybe Gran Gran forgot about it, too…_

"It's not the same as the spirit of the phoenix, Katara. So, don't worry about that."

 _Oh._

The midmorning light that shone brightly through newly constructed windows did nothing to lift the shadows that now consumed them. "It's the nickname for a woman who escaped a Fire Nation prison also called The Phoenix," Kanna explained. "It's what the Fire Nation called her, actually, because no waterbender prisoner had ever achieved such a feat. Some stories claim she must have died and come back as a spirit to haunt the prison. Guards were found with no outward signs of cause of death."

Katara could only nod. Whatever words she might have said in response were trapped in her throat by shock, sadness, and... _guilt._

"Maybe you heard of her during your time in the Fire Nation?"

 _Yeah… something like that._

"Or maybe they told you something in the village last night?"

Katara swallowed hard, pushing down the raw emotions fighting to resurface. "Um, no. There is a sickness. I tried to do some healing, but I think it might be a poison. I'm not sure."

"Hmm. I think you're right. _Poison_ is a better word than _curse_."

"But Gran Gran—"

"Katara, you should stay away from that village." Although not entirely unexpected, the warning came as a blow.

"I can't just let them suffer when I might be able to help!" Katara fired back.

"You could become infected… corrupted, even."

"I will never turn my back on people who need me!"

"There is too much fear and hatred! It's in the blood, Katara."

 _Not this again._ "There is fear and hatred in everyone! It doesn't make anyone more or less deserving—"

"It is not about who deserves what, but who is _in control_. Yes, everyone has fear and hatred, but do they control it? Or does it control them? That is the difference between—"

"I am not afraid." _And I could have all the control… if I wanted it._

"Of course you are not afraid of what you do not know."

"I _do_ know, and I am NOT afraid of Hama." _And I am NOT like her…  
_

"So, the villagers did tell you about their matriarch then?"

"No. I've met her."

Gran Gran nodded as if she somehow knew this already. Without another word, she scooped up the pile of mended clothing and disappeared through the doorway. Katara just sat there in a folded heap herself wondering if she needed mending, too.

* * *

Sometime later, after visiting Pakku's school and finding it empty and scanning the sea for any sign of Zuko and her father, Katara landed herself back in Kanna's company. This time, they stripped dried herbs for five flavor soup.

Gran Gran decided to pick up the conversation right where they left it. "What do you know about Hama?"

Katara rolled a tarragon leaf in between her finger and thumb, soothed by both the subtle motion and sweet aroma. "I know that… she was captured in a Fire Nation raid… and then escaped from prison. And she ended up in a Fire Nation village before she was arrested again."

"There are a lot of holes in that story, I'd say," Gran Gran said with a half-chuckle, half-cough.

 _It's because I do NOT want to talk about bloodbending._

"Did you know she has a daughter?"

"Yes. I've met her," Katara replied. "Her name is Hanna."

"Did you know Hanna is your father's half-sister?"

Katara's whole body seized as if bloodbent by words alone. _"What!?"_

Kanna furrowed her brow and tapped her chin lightly with her finger. "I'm not even sure if your father knows it, honestly. Probably better if he doesn't. The story is… one of great corruption. Hardly worth telling." She then shrugged as if that would effectively end the conversation.

"I want to know," Katara said firmly. She had regained control.

Kanna insisted that the telling of such sagas required bundling in warm furs by a fire with a serving of lemon ginger tea. Katara couldn't decide if this reminded her of Iroh or just old people in general, but she _did_ feel comforted as she settled in—almost _at home._ That is, until Gran Gran's story began to unfold.

* * *

"So yes, as you said, Hama was captured in a Fire Nation raid sixty or so years ago. Fire Lord Azulon's earliest campaigns were charged with rounding up all the waterbenders. He had a nasty vengeance toward the Southern Water Tribe in particular. The first word of Hama's escape came when the Fire Nation raided again twenty years later. They were looking for _The Phoenix_ , and your grandfather, the chief at the time, said he didn't know what they were talking about. It was true, but in their fury, they took the life of his oldest son instead. Your father was very young at the time and devastated by the loss of his brother. I arrived in the South Pole not long after, and it was your mother who gave Hakoda renewed hope and purpose. He loved her at first sight, and looked after her like a little sister.

I was especially grateful for your father, because as Northerners, we were not received well by the chief himself, who understandably still dwelt in the depth of his grief. Later that year, Hama returned as a welcomed war hero, the long-lost last Southern waterbender. Some people even said she had been 'reborn,' although this embittered the chief. His son had been considered the last waterbender before his untimely death. Hama resented the chief's weakness and emphasized the need to rebuild the tribe and strengthen it, especially with bending abilities. She openly entreated the chief to take her as his wife, so they could produce a suitable heir. He declined her advances, though, and focused more on building an army instead. Young boys were trained extensively in warfare and seen fit to fight by the age of 16. He was killing the tribe by sending off all our young men to die, but he didn't care. He just wanted the Fire Nation to pay for taking his son. And if others had to make the same sacrifice, then so be it.

But then, Hama revealed she was pregnant with the chief's child. He denied it vehemently, but he'd been known to drink himself into delirium before, so that was likely how she seduced him. He threatened to kill her, but I convinced him to banish her instead. Perhaps I understood the vulnerability of being pregnant and unsupported. I also knew she would be just fine on her own. Water Tribe women are survivors, you know. There is a reason we are taught healing in the north. And a reason why fighting comes so easily to us, too.

But not everyone wanted to fight, and Hama took several families with her to settle in a new village. Her followers hoped to get away from the chief and his war mongering, to save their sons from slaughter in the name of sacrifice. Hama soon gave birth to a baby girl, losing her last hope of the chief reconsidering since she'd failed to give him a male heir. When Hanna showed no signs of bending ability, the rift between mother and daughter was forever solidified.

Meanwhile a message was delivered from the Fire Nation stating that if the chief is harboring Hama, the fugitive known as The Phoenix, then he should turn her over or else suffer an attack that would leave no survivors. This was the first time he made the connection between the raid that killed his son and the entrancing refugee who arrived shortly thereafter. In his vengeful rage, he rallied to kill her and the entire village… among others.

The chief did not survive that ordeal, however, and so your father took over leadership of the tribe at age nineteen. When Hama caught word of the Fire Nation threat, she fled. She intentionally left a trail that led away from the South Pole so that we wouldn't be attacked. It was a good thing, too, because Hakoda was still young, trying to figure out how to lead _and_ grieve. And Hanna was only ten years old when the father she never knew died, and her mother abandoned her to save her life. It was a very vulnerable time in the Southern Water Tribe.

Hama came back some fifteen years later shortly before Siku was born. She didn't stay long, maybe a year or two as I recall. She was able to meet her ten-year-old grandson and discovered she finally had her prodigy child. Bending ability often skips a generation, you know. Hanna insisted that her mother would not corrupt her children, though, and eventually forbade her to see them. Hama left soon after their falling out, but not soon enough. The Fire Nation had received a tip on her whereabouts and sent another raid here to look for 'the last waterbender.'

Of course, we know there are more waterbenders here now, and thank Tui and La we won't have to live with that kind of fear anymore."

* * *

When Gran Gran finished, she quietly sipped her tea and waited. Not only had Katara neglected her own tea, she had frozen it solid. She now held the ceramic cup with such a vice grip—it was the only thing that felt secure, familiar—her anchor.

"Okaaaay," she started slowly. "I have two questions…" _Or more like a million._ "One, you say bending ability skips a generation, and I've always wondered. Does that mean my father's mother or… my mother's father were waterbenders?"

"I never met your other grandmother, so I don't know about her. You could ask your father, but he may not know, either. He is very closed when it comes to the topic of his childhood. But your mother's father… I know him very well. And yes, he is a waterbender. One of the best… or so I've heard," Kanna said with a wink.

This served as the confirmation she was looking for, but the information was still shattering nonetheless. "And... you said Hama visited when Siku was born, and then the Fire Nation came looking for her. That would have been about… seven? Eight years ago?"

All manner of mirth left the elder's face. "Katara…"

"Was it the Southern Raiders who attacked then?"

"I don't know. It was not a fleet I had seen before, though. They had sea ravens on their flags and uniforms. I only remember this because at first, I thought it was the image of The Phoenix itself, as if the Fire Nation dedicated a special unit to finding her."

"So… what you're saying is… that all this time, you _AND_ Pakku didn't see fit to tell me that he's my actual grandfather! And… that Hama, that evil witch, k-k-killed my mother."

"No, Katara. The Fire Nation killed your mother. This is why I warn you about trusting them so easily."

Katara threw down her tea cup, but there was no satisfying crash. Only a jarring _thunk_. "I don't know who to trust anymore!"

Then Katara flew as fast as she could toward the source of ultimate comfort for her, where Gran Gran would expect her to go, but so be it. She needed salt and deep and cold and free. She needed as far as the eye could see, as far as she could reach. She needed the place where burial boats never brought back the dead, and warships only brought back soldiers if they're lucky, but they might as well be dead. She needed to be dead or alive but not somewhere in between. She needed to find where her old life ended and a new one began.

She needed... Zuko? She spotted a canoe in the distance and remembered that _he_ also arrived by sea.


	10. Flight of the Dragon

**A/N:** This is a Zuko chapter with events aligning with _The Dragon and the Wolf_ , chapters 3-6. I have to admit that writing Zuko-Hakoda conversations is harder than I thought it would be since I've already spent 30 chapters developing that relationship. Also, and I think I've said this before, but any fatherly role that I portray here for Zuko does not discredit Iroh in the least. It's just _different_ , and I contend that Hakoda could grant Zuko a valuable perspective since he's removed from the Fire Nation family drama whereas Iroh is not.

* * *

"Katara."

The word wasn't spoken, yet somehow he heard it. Like a harsh whisper, parched and needy. With the pressure of something firm and soft wrapped around him, Zuko thought he was back in his igloo where Katara only visited in the lusty haze of his early morning daydreams. The faint sound of rippling water mesmerized him, too, just like her body moving in waves, commanding her element. He slowly opened his eyes, expecting his vision to be filled with orbs of blue, but instead the harsh sun beat down on him from its position high in the sky.

 _So, it is not morning. Katara is not here. I'm... on a boat... with the chief?_

A weary voice then confirmed. "Oh, good. You're awake. You need to drink water."

Realization gave way to a rise of panic. _Why can't I speak? Why can't I MOVE?  
_

Then he _did_ see blue eyes, glistening with concern, as Hakoda pushed a thin skin covering from Zuko's shoulders. He shivered as cold air hit bare skin, but it was nothing compared to the frigid arctic waters. His muscles still screamed with exhaustion, so he knew the chief must have pulled him back into the boat.

"Your clothes should be dry by now. We have the favor of the noonday sun. Or perhaps _you_ have the blessing of Agni. I didn't expect you to make it back there."

Zuko nodded and took the waterskin that Hakoda offered. "S-s-sorry."

"Zuko, it was just a paddle. It wasn't worth—" The statement was soaked in sadness and something else—disappointment? No, that wasn't it entirely. His uncle had expressed it before— _love?_ Whatever it was, it was overwhelming. The chief had already given him the mark of the trusted after ice dodging earlier that morning, but it couldn't be that simple. _Nothing_ was ever that simple, and Zuko doubted he deserved anyone's love or trust.

"I never think these things through." Zuko settled on this for an explanation.

Hakoda didn't bite. "I find that hard to believe for someone who does so much thinking."

* * *

The topic of conversation soon switched to polar bear skin which Zuko discovered he was wearing—that, and nothing else. Despite its amazing capacity at providing warmth and aid in survival, he suddenly wanted it _off._ Hakoda, with his intuitive nature, understood.

"You should get dressed. We'll be back soon. Unless you want to explain to Katara how you ended up naked in a canoe with her father," he said with a smirk.

Zuko groaned. "Well, and we already have to explain to Kanna why all the fish are burnt."

"Actually, Kanna might be interested in the polar bear skin story."

Zuko didn't like the implication and made quick business of redressing himself. The chief refused to hand over a paddle for him to help with rowing, though. As much as Zuko despised being useless, he supposed that was fair since he'd been stupid enough to drop a paddle in the ocean and then dive in after it.

"I think the polar bear would suit you, actually," Hakoda said.

Zuko folded his arms across his chest and huffed. He thought maybe the chief was talking about actual suits, and he was done playing dress up for the day.

"Kanna is very superstitious—err, _spiritual_ , I should say. She believes everyone has a spirit animal. Mine is the wolf, as you'd probably guess. The wolf is protective, adaptable, intuitive, and loyal—sometimes _too_ loyal, perhaps." Hakoda paused and pinned Zuko with a pointed look. The young Fire Lord understood he'd been the recipient of such fierce loyalty. _I even owe him my life._

The chief's expression softened. "The polar bear is strong, determined, and enduring. But its most defining characteristic is its ability to surrender to its environment. It accepts the circumstances, yet continues to thrive. I think Kanna would find this interesting. It could work to your advantage in gaining her favor."

"Why? Because she wants me to surrender? I'm sure the symbolism there would be quite validating for her, but we're not at war anymore. My approach to peace is not about give-and-take; it's about working together."

"I understand that, Zuko. It's not so much a surrender to another person, like in a fight. It's a surrender to oneself. The polar bear blends in. Maybe Kanna just needs to see you making an effort to accept her culture, that's all."

"I—" Zuko realized that throwing the fight with Pakku may have communicated submission, but it did not demonstrate acceptance. He had _a lot_ to learn about Water Tribe culture before he could claim to respect it. He needed to become immersed in order to understand.

"Well, I wasn't planning on mentioning it, but Kanna would be interested in your treasure as well," Hakoda added.

 _My what?_

"The egg," he clarified.

 _The what?_

Hakoda lifted a layer of seal skin from the assortment of gear in between them to reveal an egg-shaped stone. Zuko remembered now. He'd secured the paddle without a problem, but he'd risked his life to retrieve this... _whatever_ it is. Zuko wanted to reach out and touch it, but the look on the chief's face was almost one of warning.

Finally, he said, "Last night was a full moon. Kanna told me that our trip should be successful because it is called the 'fish moon' this time of year. I joked around with her because I grew up calling it the 'egg moon' instead."

Zuko's eyes widened at yet another story of Water Tribe symbolism—it was fascinating. He raised his eyebrows and bobbed his head, encouraging the chief to tell him more.

Hakoda's expression remained grim. "You see, Kanna is from the North, and the 'fish moon' means that an abundance of fish are spawning this time of year. You saw today that we only have a small cove where that happens down here. In the South, we call it the 'egg moon,' and it's a bad omen. If a child is conceived during this moon cycle, he or she will be born in the dead of winter, when the chances of survival are slim."

"S-s-so you're saying that me finding some petrified egg in the ocean is a bad omen?"

"I'm not. I personally don't put that much stake in that sort of thing. I'm just warning you. In case Kanna says something."

Zuko did notice there were different levels of spiritualism among the South Pole citizens he'd met so far. It was the same in the Fire Nation, he supposed. He'd even argued recently with the head Fire Sage about interpreting the sovereign will of Agni. He wondered what Katara thought about spirit animals and moon meanings.

 _Is that... Katara?_

They were close enough now for him to make out her figure standing on the docks. When her face came into view, he could tell she had been crying. He wouldn't have a chance to ask her, though. By the time they secured the canoe and disembarked, Kanna was also there waiting for them. Hakoda immediately jumped into the story about how Zuko charred all the fish, a Fire Nation way to _preserve_ them, he said. He even mentioned the whole polar bear spirit animal thing much to the Fire Lord's chagrin.

But when she saw the egg, Kanna's whole face lit up. To Zuko, she was almost unrecognizable without her furrowed brow and hardened scowl.

"So, it's true!" She gasped, her gloved hands framing her expression of wonderment.

"What, Gran Gran?" Katara tugged at the old woman's elbow while casting a sideways glance at Zuko.

The old woman's eyes sparkled like faceted gemstones. "Have I ever told you about the Legend of Makenna?"

* * *

"So, this Legend of Makenna is that important, huh? That the whole village has to hear it?" Zuko didn't care that he and Katara had been charged with stripping herbs, a job that she had apparently left unfinished earlier that day. He was just grateful to finally spend time with her.

"Gran Gran seems to think so," Katara said with a long and labored sigh.

Zuko set aside the strange-smelling green plantlike things. He would ask questions about Water Tribe cuisine later. "Hey... are you OK?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. So, what happened out there? Where did the egg come from? And seriously, what did you do to all the fish?"

Zuko knew that her smile was fake and her scolding tone intended to draw the attention away from herself. _So, she's not ready to talk about it. And that's OK._

"Oh, umm. So, your dad and I were fishing in the freshwater cove over by the ice dodging course. We actually had to go through the course to get there, so—"

She lightly tapped his forehead. "Did you get a mark?"

He caught a whiff of lemon and ginger as she withdrew her hand. It reminded him of Uncle. "Huh?"

"For ice dodging. Sounds like my dad was testing you. So... how did you do?"

"Uhh, yeah. The mark of the trusted. But then I broke his trust, I messed up. I burned the fish because I—" _I never think things through. I'm a failure at everything I do._

"It's OK, Zuko. You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to."

He wondered if that was her way of saying thanks—and reminding him—of the pass he'd given her on talking just now. She knew it was hard for him to discuss his failure, his shame. _Does she feel like a failure somehow? Is she... ashamed?_

He decided to keep talking anyway. "So, then I accidentally dropped a paddle in the ocean. I figured I could get it... because I swam in the North Pole after all. But when I was underwater, I felt this weird sensation. Like an intense heat was calling to me, pulling at me. It was the egg, and I had to go back for it. It was like I didn't have a choice."

"I'm sure you had a choice, Zuko. Everyone has a choice."

 _It's never that simple._ "That's how your Dad ended up saving me... the stuff with the polar bear skin." Zuko felt his face turn red as he imagined the chief stripping him of his clothes. Did he have to resuscitate, too? Would things be... _awkward_ between them now?

"You know, it's not fair that he gets you alone and naked when I don't."

Katara's sultry tone combined with Zuko's current train of thought didn't compute. "Hey, that's just... don't..." His words were cut off with her very insistent kiss.

Their kiss was cut off by a very insistent _"Ahem."_

"Zuko, I need your help carrying all the fish to the festival grounds. Kanna wants to have a feast before she tells the Legend of Makenna," Hakoda said.

Father and daughter avoided eye contact. Zuko tried to suppress his hammering heart that had lurched into his throat. "Yessir."

Now, _that_ was awkward.

* * *

If Zuko was going to say it, now was as good a time as any. "I'm sorry, sir. For what happened earlier."

Hakoda stopped mid-stride and shifted the weight of the two baskets of burnt fish he was carrying. "Sorry for what, Zuko? It's OK to kiss her, you know. I didn't mean to interrupt. There's just a lot of work to do, that's all."

Zuko could leave it at that, but he could tell by the way the chief was looking at him, they both knew he had something else to say. "No, I meant from earlier on the boat. For breaking your trust. I made a bad decision, and you were disappointed in me. I will do better next time."

At this, Hakoda set down his baskets, and Zuko did the same.

"I wasn't disappointed in you, Zuko. I was afraid of losing you. Do you understand the difference? I care about you because of who you are, not what you do."

Zuko nodded even though he didn't understand at all. _Don't my actions determine who I am? Or is it... the other way around?_

Chief Intuition was right on cue. "It's OK to be confused. You are young and still figuring out who you are. And you will make lots of bad decisions. So, it's important that you learn from your mistakes and try to do better next time, as you say. But don't do it for me. Do it for yourself. I gave you the mark of the trusted because _I_ trust you, Zuko. But you need to learn to trust yourself."

"Yessir." _I can't very well trust what I do not know._

"It's a lot to take in, Zuko. Trust is a hard thing to build back up when it's been broken."

 _Or hard to recognize when I don't see it often._ "I don't want to break yours, sir."

"I know."

The chief was smiling at him now, and Zuko _still_ didn't understand. These fatherly vibes—love, confidence, concern, trust—were always so foreign to him. Just like with his uncle, he had to travel very far to find them. And in order to receive them, he had to leave something behind.

"I'm sorry about yesterday, too." Zuko pressed a finger to his temple where scarred flesh barely registered the touch. "When I wasn't truthful about..."

Hakoda's smile quickly faded into a deep set frown. "Well, you weren't exactly forthcoming, but you didn't lie. I'm just sorry that you had to endure that kind of pain. Nothing you could have done would ever justify—"

"It was to teach respect."

"There is a difference between commanding respect and ruling through fear. The strategy may win a few decisive battles, but inflicts a war's worth of wounds."

 _Funny you would mention strategy and war._ Did the chief already know how he got his scar?

"I saw another scar of yours today," Hakoda redirected. The one you got when you fought your sister."

 _Well, he knows about that one at least._ "Yessir." Zuko eyed the baskets now, wishing the conversation would end.

"I meant it when I said that I would trust you with my life and the lives of my loved ones. You already proved yourself trustworthy when you took that lightening bolt for Katara. You earned your mark, Zuko."

"Thank you, sir." He wondered what would happen if he picked up the fish and started walking.

"You still don't seem convinced."

"I'm sorry. I hear what you're saying, I just don't know that I've done enough, yet."

"Zuko, I know you understand things in terms of trials and rituals. So, if there were such a thing as ice dodging in the Fire Nation, then this would be your mark of the trusted." Hakoda placed a hand on his own chest. "And _that_ would be your mark of the brave." He pointed at the left side of the young Fire Lord's face.

 _I was anything but brave that day._

"Are there any other marks?" Zuko asked, genuinely curious albeit emotionally spent.

"Yes. The mark of the wise."

"Only three?"

"Yes. Because ice dodging is supposed to be done in groups of three. And you can only receive one of them when you do your part," Hakoda explained. "It's not about performance. It's about accountability. That's what honor means in the Water Tribe."

"What mark did you receive, Chief?"

"I didn't. My father never took me ice dodging." Ice blue eyes turned cold and fierce, and somehow Zuko _knew._ And this was something he understood, too.

* * *

As the day pressed on with preparations for the feast and Kanna's epic storytelling, Zuko did as he was told and helped where he could, but was largely preoccupied by his recent interactions with Hakoda. He was less intimated and more intrigued by his girlfriend's father now. The chief led his tribe by listening and serving. He taught his children by empowering and encouraging. Perhaps he was a little _too_ trusting—of the Fire Lord dating his daughter or the Northerners' plans for reconstruction. Or maybe he understood the importance of international corporation. Or more simply put, people need people, no matter where they're from or who they are.

Hakoda really was like a wolf—protective on the home front, adaptable on the world scene, intuitive to others' needs, loyal to meet those needs...

Zuko thought he could be that kind of leader. The kind that builds people up instead of tearing them down. _I wonder what my spirit animal is?_

Little did he know, he was about to find out.

* * *

With the egg positioned next to her, the whole tribe surrounding her, and the firelight illuminating her weather-worn face, Kanna began the long-awaited saga.

"In recent weeks, the North and the South have come together to help restore and rebuild our tribe here in the South Pole. I have heard grumbling and bickering and accusations and suspicions, and it saddens me. These are supposed to be times of peace. We are supposed to to be sister tribes, working together, not tearing each other apart. I am even from the North, and what I am about to tell you is a treasured legend from the South. Am I worthy to tell it? You bet a striped-bellied tiger seal's whiskers I am."

She paused to allow for a few chuckles from the crowd before continuing in a firm voice. "We all come from the same place anyway, North and South, alike. Someday I will tell you the legend of the Lion Turtles, but tonight we speak the name of Smoke on the Water, the heroine of the 61-Day Siege, Makenna of the Southern Water Tribe."

Zuko heard a collective gasp and felt Katara huddle in closer to him. He knew this story did not cast a positive light on the Fire Nation—as if _any_ story ever did—and he suddenly wished he was anywhere else but here.

"Makenna was a woman of rare beauty. She was also fiery and spirited, prone to outbursts, so no tribesman would seek to control her. She always felt different from her people. She felt misunderstood and alone. And it was true. She was different. It was rare for someone from the Water Tribe to have the spirit of the dragon, but Makenna did. A greater purpose burned within her, and one day, her story took flight. Because one day, Makenna met a dragon.

The Fire Nation army that attacked our tribe was ruthless and relentless. Rumor had it that Fire Lord Sozin led the faction himself. Our warriors were able to hold their own, but after more than a moon cycle's worth of fighting, our forces were growing threadbare and weak. Makenna felt drawn to the Fire Nation camp for some reason, a _calling_ if you will, and since she often wandered alone anyway, no one missed her presence in the village.

This is when Makenna first met Sora, Fire Lord Sozin's dragon. It is hard to say whether or not Sora was her actual spirit animal, but since Makenna was the spirit of the dragon, the connection was there, nonetheless. Sora was heartbroken over the loss of her companion, Fang, Avatar Roku's dragon. She sought the reincarnation of the Avatar so as to reconnect with a past life and lost love. Sora revealed that Sozin also sought the Avatar but for destructive purposes. He would not leave the South Pole until all was destroyed as was his doing in the Air Nation.

Makenna then devised a plan to revive Sora's spirit, fulfill Sozin's mission, and save her people. With her exotic Water Tribe beauty and her powerful dragon spirit, she seduced Sozin, convincing him that the child they conceived together would be the next Avatar. She did this in full knowledge that she would have to leave the Water Tribe to go live in the Fire Nation, but her people would be safe. And she would get to be with Sora.

At the same time Makenna became a mother, so did the dragon. Their spiritual connection deepened. Now that she had laid her egg, though, Sora wished to join Fang in the spirit world. She entrusted the care of her offspring to Makenna, and in turn, Makenna entrusted the spirit of her child to Sora. By this point, Sozin was an embittered old man. He had lost his taste for war and only wanted the warmth of Makenna in his bed. While she had hoped to return home some day, her life was comfortable and easy in the Fire Nation. She figured Sozin would be dead by the time their child would show signs of being the Avatar... or not.

Fire Lord Sozin outlived them all. When it was confirmed that their son was not the Avatar, at the mere age of three, Sozin killed the boy. Wrought with grief, Makenna took Sora's egg and escaped for the Water Tribe. She almost made it home, but a thick fog on the water made for poor visibility. She crashed into an iceberg and went plunging into the sea. A fishing crew found her boat, a small Fire Nation vessel, just as the gray clouds lifted the next morning. Her body was never found, so this is why we call her Smoke on the Water. Her dragon spirit dwells in the early morning mist where she mourns the loss of her son."

Kanna closed her eyes and folded her hands in her lap. An occasional sigh or sniff could be heard. Zuko didn't know how everyone could remain so calm when his thoughts were racing like mad. _What about my grandfather, Azulon? Is Makenna his mother, too? Do we... am I... Water Tribe?_

Then there was the undeniable draw of the damn egg—he could _feel_ it again.

Kanna's eyes shot open, and she was staring right at him. "The egg was never found, either," she said. "Until today."

"Wha-what? So, you're saying that this is… the dragon egg? S-s-sora's egg?" Zuko stammered.

"That is precisely what I'm saying," Kanna confirmed.

"But it can't be!"

"And why not? Chief Hakoda told me where you found it. Not far from where the glaciers jut out in the sea. The location is right. It sure looks like a dragon egg to me, granted I've never seen one before. But the fact that _you_ found it, Fire Lord Zuko, should be confirmation enough. And if you need further proof, touch it again. Feel the heat. Feel the power. You know the story is true because it is _in_ you, too."

 _"In_ me? What's in me?"

Zuko searched both Katara and Hakoda for some indication they knew what was going on but only received shrugs and blank stares. He looked hopelessly back at Kanna.

"Your spirit animal is not the polar bear, although I did find the story from today's fishing trip quite amusing."

 _Oh yeah, so what is my spirit animal then?_ Zuko did not expect the old woman to actually answer.

"Fire Lord Zuko, your spirit animal embodies strength and courage. You are powerful, but not power-seeking. Your purpose is not to control, but to create balance. You are fire, but you do not burn and destroy. Instead, you are fire that rekindles and restores. You are the spirit of reconciliation. You are the spirit of the dragon."


	11. Keeping Up Appearances

Throughout the course of her grandmother's storytelling, Katara sensed a heat that had settled among the crowd and a dampness enveloped them almost like a dense fog. The air was clear, however, except for the smoke from the ceremonial fire spiraling upward in columns, carried by the frigid night wind. Katara shivered, despite feeling flush. She expected Zuko to notice and offer to share his inner fire as he usually did, but he was intently focused on Gran Gran's every word.

With the proclamation of the dragon as Zuko's spirit animal at the culmination of the story, a wave of exhaustion overcame her almost to the point of fainting. But it was Zuko who passed out first, and the flurry of activity that ensued gave Katara a renewed surge of strength.

"My Lord! Are you all right?" Ming was the first to respond, as a well-trained guard should, by positioning Zuko flat on the ground to check his breathing. "Lady Katara, what happened?"

"I-I don't know." Katara's knees began to buckle but strong arms supported her shoulders from behind. She leaned back to find familiar ice blue eyes gazing warmly at her. "Thanks Dad," she whispered.

The father-daughter moment was quickly ruined, however, when Malina appeared at Hakoda's side. "There's a healing method taught in the North for when someone passes out! Do you know it, Katara?" she asked.

"Of course I know it," Katara seethed as she rolled up the sleeves of her parka, uncorked her waterskin, and knelt down next to the unconscious Fire Lord.

"OK, back up everyone. Give them some space," Hakoda directed.

When Katara placed glowing hands on Zuko's temples, someone from the crowd gasped, "Look! She's a healer like the Northerners!"

She hesitated as Kian's words came to mind. _She's not a healer, Mika. Not like the Northerners, anyway._ No, Katara was a special kind of healer—from the South—a _bloodbender_. She shuddered and withdrew her hands.

"Don't worry, Skeet," her father reassured. "He's going to be fine. A lot happened today that probably just overwhelmed him."

"And the shock of the cold water has caught up to him, no doubt," Gran Gran added.

Katara closed her eyes and tried to concentrate, but even with the near-full moon, her bending seemed blocked. A chill of panic began to rise but was instantly quelled when a warm hand touched her forearm. _Only a firebender could generate heat on a cold night like this._

Surprisingly, it wasn't Zuko who had reached out nor his golden gaze that met hers, yet she felt comforted all the same. Funny how in this sea of Water Tribe, fire would be the element to light the way.

"We should go somewhere more private," Ming suggested. "Where Fire Lord Zuko can properly rest, and you can focus better on your healing."

"Yes, thank you," Katara replied.

Others nodded in agreement and without further discussion, Hakoda scooped up Zuko in his arms and began the trek back with Ming and Malina falling in step behind him. Katara staggered while standing up, so she took a minute to regain her footing and clear her head.

Just when she was feeling steady enough, Gran Gran pulled the wobbly waterbender into a giant gopher-bear hug. "I always knew you had the spirit of healing." The old woman beamed at her. "The Fire Lord has chosen wisely. He will need a healer to look after him."

Katara wondered if this was Gran Gran's way of giving her blessing. The dragon egg and spirit animal talk had seemingly abated their situation, but she knew Zuko would resent the notion of Katara as a mere medical handmaiden. The sentiment was strange coming from Gran Gran, even—a strong woman who shunned the rigid customs of her homeland and led a small struggling village during the height of war.

Katara could only hope there was not a connection between Zuko's newly revealed dragon and her purposely concealed phoenix. Spirit animal or not, she did not wish to be reminded of Ozai or Hama in any way.

* * *

Katara caught up to the others near the igloo encampment on the outskirts of the city just in time to join in a heated discussion.

"The igloos are too cold, and there's not enough space for Katara to do the healing," Ming entreated.

"I agree, but we do not want to undermine Kanna," Malina warned.

"We can take him to our place," Hakoda said. "We have a spare bedroom."

"No way am I going to stay with _her_ ," Katara interjected with a nod in Malina's direction. "He's going to _my_ place."

Malina rolled her eyes. "That's what I mean by undermining Kanna, though. She doesn't want you two staying together… for appearances. She gives Koda and me flak about it all the time. Trust me, you don't want to deal with it."

"Maybe you _should_ think about appearances… being the chief and all." Even though the comment was intended for her father, Katara looked pointedly at his girlfriend instead.

"Says the chief's daughter… dating the Fire Lord," Malina fired back with a smirk.

"Enough!" Hakoda shifted his weight with a grunt. "Zuko is not getting any better… or lighter as we stand here. We're going to our place."

"I'll stay with them," Ming offered. "In Katara's apartment."

The Chief stared blankly at the Fire Nation guard for a few seconds, then relented. "Fine. Let's go."

Katara mouthed the words _thank you_ , amazed that Ming had come to her rescue yet again.

* * *

Once the awkward goodbyes with her father had passed and Zuko was tucked in her bed, Katara began checking his vitals. She felt herself wavering, though, and a healing session would have to wait until later. Ming noticed and immediately set to work making lemon-ginger tea to help rehydrate and rejuvenate. Katara soon joined Ming in the sitting area of her small single-roomed apartment and sipped the steaming beverage appreciatively.

"Are you hungry, my Lady?"

"Ming, you're not my servant. If anything, you're my guest. Please, have some tea yourself." Katara didn't wait for an answer before reaching for another cup and pouring a second serving.

Ming received the gesture with a slight bow of her head. "Thank you, my Lady."

They drank in companionable silence until both drained their drinks, relishing the warmth after spending several hours outdoors.

"Would you like more?" Katara asked.

She caught Ming in mid-yawn. "Mmmmmm, I'm so sorry!"

"It's OK! It's been a long day." Katara glanced back toward the bed where Zuko was now softly snoring. "You don't have to stay here. Really, we'll be fine. We could all use some rest, I bet. Besides, Bato would probably miss you."

Ming suddenly found her hands in her lap very interesting. "Oh, umm… I'm not staying with Bato."

Katara raised her eyebrows, but then remembered that Ming was staying in the igloos along with Zuko and the rest of his guard. A combination of anger and confusion flared. "Rrrrrright. Because everyone is so worried about appearances."

At this, Ming made eye contact, and something flickered there. "My duty is first and foremost to the Fire Lord as a member of his royal guard."

 _Of course. The honor thing_. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean—"

"I know you will take good care of him, but I also made a promise to the Chief," she continued. "Establishing trust between the Fire Nation and Water Tribe is top priority for Fire Lord Zuko… not just for this trip… and _not_ just for appearances."

Katara sighed. "You're right, Ming. Admittedly I haven't been thinking very diplomatically lately." _I've been a little consumed by matters of… family._

"Actually, _diplomacy_ is more about appearances while relationships should be about authenticity."

Katara could only nod in response, her brain muddled by recent revelations that made her doubt everything and trust no one.

 _I am bound to Hama by both blood and bloodbending. My father doesn't even know about his half-sister living in the next village._

 _Meanwhile, Master Pakku passed on both genes and teachings in waterbending but never told me he was my grandfather._

 _Gran Gran gives these lengthy accounts of family history and tells elaborate tribal legends, but ultimately only chooses the parts that suit her, ignoring a larger context and perhaps missing a greater lesson._

 _Dad is… well… Malina is making me mad. Here's a woman half his age from the North going around and messing everything up!_

 _Ming is probably the most honorable person here, but she is steadfastly loyal to her position. Where does this leave Bato? Have they established trust between Fire Nation and Water Tribe? Have Zuko and I?_

 _WHY HASN'T HE PROPERLY PROPOSED, YET!?_

* * *

As a compromise, of sorts, Ming offered to stand guard outside in the apartment corridor. Katara didn't think it was necessary, but she was too tired to care. Since arriving in the South Pole, she was now finally alone with Zuko, but simply slipped out of her clothes and collapsed next to him in bed. Just before drifting off to sleep, she overheard Bato's voice in the hallway. He, too, was trying to convince Ming to leave, apparently anxious for a rare moment of privacy.

"Don't worry about Zuko. He is in good hands," Bato said. "And don't worry about the chief, either. He has plenty else to keep him busy."

"But I—Mmmmmm." Ming's protest was cut short.

Katara cursed the thin walls and shoddy construction of the apartment building. Bato was like a surrogate father to her, and she did _not_ want to listen to him do _that._

Thankfully, her silent pleas were heeded.

"Ming… come with me," the tribesman entreated.

As their footsteps faded, Katara smiled at this newfound knowledge of the oh-so-honorable Ming. Sure, sometimes it was good to keep up appearances. But it was better to be true to oneself.


	12. Appearances Can Be Deceiving

**A/N:** This chapter correlates with Chapter 7: Man Hunt of _The Dragon and the Wolf_ which offers Zuko's perspective. I've basically screwed myself, I've decided, by writing that "side fic" about Zuko and Hakoda which covers the goings-on in the South Pole. It doesn't cover Katara's perspective, though, or some Water Tribe backstory I would like to explore, so that is what I plan to write here in _Beyond the Silver Lining_ for the time being until I can bridge the gap between the two fics (Dragon and Silver Lining) to finish out the overall story arc of the "trilogy" (which is not really a trilogy anymore, but oh well). If you're still around, thanks for sticking with me!

* * *

Katara burrowed under a thick wool blanket, trying to block out the voices she could hear from the other side of the wall. The day had been frustrating, especially with her botched attempts at waterbending, and she just wanted to forget it all and go to sleep.

"Do you think she's asleep?"

Katara's breath caught. She poked her head out from underneath the covers and waited through the long pause before her grandmother spoke again. "She won't get any better at waterbending on her own. You should consider finding her a teacher, Hakoda."

"She's seven, Kanna. And there aren't any other benders here in the South," her father answered gruffly.

"She has family in the North, you know. A master, even."

"If I send her there, all they will do is find her a suitor. And she's _seven_."

"With all due respect, you gave Sokka a jaw blade at age seven, and the Fire Nation starts training their youth at age eight—"

"She is NOT Sokka. And we are NOT Fire Nation. Now is not the time to fight."

"It is a shame to waste her gifts. Have her train in the healing arts, then."

"Not _waste_ , Kanna. WAIT."

"You cannot wait with a spirit like hers. The phoenix is both fighter and healer. Can't you see she is ready to fly?"

The chief released a drawn-out sigh. "The phoenix is a firebird, born of the sun. Katara is a child of water, born of the moon. She belongs here at home with her family. End of discussion."

Gran Gran did not heed the tone of warning in his voice. "I know you don't believe in spirit animals, but it wouldn't be the first crossover between Fire Nation and Water Tribe. According to the Legend of Makenna—"

"You're right. I don't believe in spirit animals, and I don't believe in legends, either. Makenna married a Fire Lord, and there is NO WAY that is EVER happening to MY daughter! End. Of. Discussion."

Katara listened to her father stomp away, his footsteps echoing ominously throughout their small yak-hide hut.

 _What is a phoenix? And who is Makenna?_

Someone groaned beside her. _Sokka?_ Did he hear, too, or did he sleep through? Perhaps he would know the answers to her questions.

 _Mmmmmmmph._

Katara awoke with a start, feeling strangely amused by Gran Gran, renewed anger toward her Dad, and suddenly desperate to talk to Sokka.

 _Was that a dream… or a memory?_

The source of the noise next to her happened to be the Fire Lord sharing her bed—the person she was not supposed to marry? Of course, her seven-year-old self would have never believed it, and clearly her family had come a long way in finally accepting it.

 _Or have they?_

Makenna's story did not end well, and Katara feared the parallel. Just a few months ago, she had been thrilled to find a precedent for a Fire Lord taking a Water Tribe wife. Back in the Fire Nation, she felt so certain, but here at home, nothing made sense anymore.

Well, except Zuko. He was pretty easy to read. She knew he had a diplomatic strategy, a pressing personal question for the chief, a desire to learn about Water Tribe society, and underneath it all, he just wanted a family.

And whenever he looked at her like _that_ , she perfectly understood his meaning.

The dream had left her flustered, however, and Ming's comments about appearances and authenticity made her paranoid. She glanced nervously around the room, looking for a diversion. "This is one of the new apartment buildings that's part of the reconstruction project," she said as if he'd asked. "It's nice enough, I guess. We're pretty high up, so my favorite part is the view. Come on, I'll show you."

Katara stood and grabbed the nearest piece of clothing to hopefully deflect the hungry golden gaze that followed her, but it was _his_ shirt, and the attempt completely backfired. He always loved it when she wore his tunic… and nothing else. She wasn't trying to torture him. Would he believe that it was laundry day?

She quickly crossed the room and opened the window, allowing a rush of crisp morning wind prickle at her bare skin. She breathed in deeply—the smell of the sea was invigorating, and she could sense every drop of water suspended in the air. _Even if it doesn't feel like home, I am still in my element. I am fine as long as I have my waterbending._

But she wasn't. Not really. Bending used to make her feel free… and powerful. Now it made her feel bound by duty, and with power came responsibility. She was strong-willed and opinionated, but was that a good thing? For all of Zuko's faults and struggles, he made leadership look easy. He was born to be Fire Lord, whether he believed he could do the job or not. Katara wasn't sure how well she would do as Fire Lady.

"Sokka and Suki are here!" she exclaimed suddenly. Their figures were still small in the distance, yet she'd know her brother's gait anywhere. "Let's go see them!"

She'd finally found her diversion, although she hated how crestfallen Zuko looked as she finished getting dressed. She couldn't explain, but for the moment, she just needed to get away.

* * *

Katara took a longer route to Gran Gran's hut so as to give Sokka and Suki a chance to arrive and greet everyone first. About halfway there, she realized she was wearing Zuko's parka instead of hers. In her haste to leave the apartment, she'd grabbed anything that was blue, forgetting that Sokka had recently gifted the Fire Lord with new cold weather gear so he would fit in better here. Katara had worn her brother's hand-me-downs so often growing up, that she didn't even notice that the jacket was too big for her. Should she go back and get her purple one? _Hmm, what would Zuko do?_

While her brain told her one thing—to go rescue her boyfriend from purple parka peril—her feet led her onward to her destination. Upon arrival, she immediately regretted her decision. _Everyone_ was here—Gran Gran, Pakku, Dad, Malina, Sokka, and Suki. Not only was she wearing Zuko's jacket, but she still had on his tunic underneath. This would not look good at all.

But before she could slip away unnoticed, Sokka intercepted her in the entryway. "Katara! How are you? We just got here!" He pulled her into a near-suffocating gopher-bear hug. "Hey, isn't that the parka I gave—"

"Shhhhhhhhh," she cut him off with a harsh whisper and a scolding finger. "I'll be right back. Oh, hi Suki! See you in a few!" she called over her shoulder as she scurried into the next room.

She hadn't been lying about laundry day. She sifted through a pile of clothes until she found her shirt from the day before yesterday. After a quick sniff test, she decided it would have to do. Without thinking, she tossed Zuko's tunic in the pile, deposited the parka in the entryway, and headed for the common room.

 _Wait. That won't work. No one will notice the parka, but…_

She doubled back to the laundry pile, grabbed a pair of shears from Gran Gran's sewing kit, and snipped a small hole in Zuko's shirt. She then draped it over her arm, planning to use the excuse that she'd brought it because it needed mending.

 _Ugh, so much trouble just for appearances. It's not like anything happened. And even if it did, it shouldn't matter._

"But appearances matter!" Gran Gran was saying when Katara finally joined the rest of her family in the next room. "And as the chief, you should consider what this looks like from a political standpoint as well as ethical."

"To some extent, I can agree that one should not mix business with pleasure," Hakoda said through gritted teeth. "But I don't see anything _unethical_ about me dating Malina. And I assure you, it does not affect any business dealings with the North."

" _I'm_ not saying it does, but people talk. _Your_ people, Hakoda."

"There will always be talk. It's what people do, Kanna."

"It's not that you shouldn't date each other. I'm only suggesting that you two have separate apartments. It would just… look better."

Malina started to say something, but Hakoda placed a hand on her arm and shook his head. "I don't care what it looks like, and I don't care what people say!" he snapped.

"Oh, come on now, you do care," Kanna countered. "Start thinking with your head instead of your—"

"That's it. I'm done here. I have work to do." The chief took several strides toward the door, stopped to draw in a deep breath, then turned back around. "Malina, I'll meet you for lunch. Sokka, hunting this afternoon?"

"Yes sir!" Sokka replied with a goofy grin and a fake salute.

Hakoda softened almost to the point of smiling. "Good morning, Katara. How's Zuko?"

"He's much better," she said. _At least, I think he is. I kinda left before finding out_.

"If he's feeling up to it, tell him to come hunting with us later," her father offered. "If that's OK with you, Sokka?"

"Oooh, Fire Lord versus boar-q-pine, part two? Sounds good to me!"

"Sokka!" Katara punched him on the shoulder. "No repeats of the hunting trip in Ba Sing Se!"

Hakoda let out his big booming laugh, then reached for Malina's hand. The two of them left together with Gran Gran glaring at their backs. Her frown faded, however, when she saw what Katara was holding. "Is that Zuko's, my dear?"

 _Great. It's my turn for a lecture_. "Oh, y-y-yes, it is. It has a hole in it."

The old woman raised an eyebrow. "That won't do, will it? I'll go get my sewing kit."

Pakku stood up from his spot as silent spectator and stretched. "I'm headed to the school then. Katara, join me later, if you will?"

"Yes sir," she replied.

Almost as soon as the master left, a shirtless Zuko arrived at the door.

* * *

When Katara stopped by the waterbending school later that day, she found Siku and Sura in a worse state than the time before. Pakku was facing away from them and running rigorously through drills, seemingly oblivious to the girls. Siku stood with her arms folded, staring at some fixed point on the floor. Sura was in a fit of tears with red swollen eyes and fists clinched tight. Katara knew something had to be done.

"Stop, stop, stop," she said by way of announcing her presence. "This is not a waterbending lesson. They can't possibly be learning anything this way!"

Siku took a few steps back as if frightened by Katara's comment. Sura stopped crying, wiped her nose with the back of her sleeve, and turned to watch Pakku for his reaction.

"It's because they're impossible!" the master barked. "They won't do the moves, so I figured if they watched me do them, they could learn by osmosis."

"We already know them."

Siku spoke so softly, that Katara thought she imagined it.

"Impossible," Pakku grumbled.

"How… how would you know?" Katara asked.

Siku bit her lip, and her eyes darted toward that interesting spot on the floor again.

"Our brother taught us," Sura said.

 _That's right… Gran Gran mentioned Hama's grandson. A prodigy, even._

Katara shivered at the thought. "Is your brother back at the village? With your mom?"

"N-n-o, he—" Sura started.

"Shhhhhhh!" Siku side-eyed her sister. "That's enough!"

A sick feeling settled in the bottom of Katara's stomach. According to Gran Gran's story, Hama came back to visit the South Pole around the time Siku was born and met her ten-year-old grandson then. _That would make him, what? 18? 19-years-old now?_ _Definitely old enough to be a master._

Even though her mind was reeling, Katara tried to act casual. "Yeah, I didn't see him when I went to your village the other night. I met your mother, though."

"You went to our village?" Sura asked.

"You met our mother?" Siku's response was more somber than her sister's.

Pakku made an exasperated noise, and Katara took the hint. "How about we take a walk? We can leave Master Pakku here to… prepare for his next lesson."

"There are no other lessons," he intoned. "You three are the only waterbenders in the South."

"Malina is here, and she's a waterbender, isn't she?" Katara said with a smirk.

"Yes, but—"

"And Siku and Sura's brother is a waterbender, too. So maybe there are more we don't know about?"

"Master Katara?" Sura pulled on the sleeve of her tunic—the same one she had been wearing when she visited the school the other day, pulled _fresh_ from the dirty laundry pile. "Can we bring Stick with us on our walk?" the girl asked.

Katara quirked a brow. "Stick?" _Like a walking stick?_

"He's our polar dog," Siku said with a smile.

And since it was the first time Katara had seen either one of the girls smile, of course she had to say yes.


	13. Push and Pull

When I started this chapter many months ago, I was binge watching _Dare Devil_ , hence the reference to Stick. I actually wrote the ending to this story years ago (and then wrote a supposed side fic called, _The Dragon and the Wolf)_. Tying everything together has proven difficult, and then of course, LIFE gets in the way. All of that to say, I know where I'm headed... it's just a matter of getting there! To anyone still following the trilogy, thanks again for sticking with me!

* * *

"So, Stick is blind?" Katara placed her hand in front of the polar dog's giant muzzle so he could smell her. A gust of hot breath and a slick welcoming tongue signaled approval, although she stumbled back a few steps to keep from falling down. Katara laughed in spite of herself, remembering a childhood friend with a polar dog pet. She also thought briefly of Appa… and Aang… and her mirth was suddenly overshadowed by a pang of sadness.

 _Things were much simpler… during the war. I miss… the simplicity._

Before she had a chance to dwell on this disturbing notion, a series of high-pitched giggles brought Katara back to the present.

"Yeah, he is. But he doesn't know it." Sura scratched the tufts of scraggly white fur behind Stick's ears. "Come on, boy!"

Sure enough, the polar dog bounded after his owner as if everything was normal, pummeling enough snow in his wake to bury Katara up to her waist. From a few steps behind, Siku effortlessly bent the snow away, casting an exasperated expression in her sister's direction.

"He's doing much better, actually," she said softly.

"Better? Was he sick?" Katara asked.

"It was pretty bad before we came to the city. He could barely walk. Dad said—" Tears began to brim the older girl's pale blue eyes. "We were going to do a burial at sea. But then he started getting better."

"Hmmm." Katara mused, reflecting on her recent visit to Siku and Sura's village and the peculiar illness that plagued people there. "What about you and your sister? Or your Dad? Have you been sick, too?"

"No, only Mom." Siku bristled as if the conversation made her very uncomfortable.

"What about your brother?"

If discussing her mother was difficult, then this topic was clearly painful, if not unbearable. "He's not there," she said after a beat through gritted teeth. "He left… a long time ago."

Katara knew she shouldn't press further, but she really wanted to know more about this prodigy bender—Hama's grandson... and her _cousin?_ Katara had been so caught up in Zuko's discovery of the egg and the telling of the Legend of Makenna, that she hadn't had time to fully process Gran Gran's story from the other night.

They continued to walk in thoughtful, albeit awkward silence, until they caught up to Sura standing at the edge of a snowbank. She lifted a gloved hand to her furrowed forehead, seemingly searching for something in the distance. "I guess I threw the fetch too far this time," she said.

Katara quirked her brow. "Fetch?"

Siku let out an exaggerated sigh. "The dog's name is Stick, because he thinks the stick is called a fetch."

Katara, still dumbfounded, looked back and forth between the two girls.

Sura giggled. "Like if you say, 'Go get the stick,' he'll just stand there. But if you say, 'Go get the fetch…"

As if on cue, the dog gamboled toward them with the stick— _fetch?_ —in his mouth. He skidded to a halt, placed his prize as Sura's feet, and sat back on his haunches.

"It's cute," Katara said with a smile.

"Well, it's better than the name Koko gave him." Sura shook her head disapprovingly. "Pup. Short for Puppet, I think? Koko wasn't very nice to Stick, either, so when he left, we decided to start over with a new name."

"Who's Koko?" Katara dreaded the answer. The mentioning of a puppet made her shudder, knowing it couldn't simply be a coincidence.

"He's our brother," Sura said without hesitation. "I called him Koko when I was a baby, because I couldn't say his name. He hated it, though."

"Sura!" Siku hissed under her breath, a redness rising to her cheeks.

Katara sensed that her suspicions were true, especially with the mixture of fear and fury that befell Siku's features. Sura seemed oblivious to her sister's discomfort and quite willing to talk about their estranged family member. Katara still had many burning questions, but figured Sura didn't remember _Koko_ as well as Siku did. So she heeded the warning to drop the subject for now.

"Can I play with him?" Katara gestured toward the stick that was still sitting in the snow at Sura's feet.

"Of course!" the younger girl exclaimed, and though she couldn't be sure, Katara thought she heard Siku sigh in relief.

* * *

Admittedly, the simple joy of playing fetch was more fun than anything Katara had done in a long time, especially since arriving back at the South Pole. Sura's giggles were infectious, and even surly Siku allowed an occasional smile to grace her otherwise solemn demeanor. Katara understood all too well—some kind of sorrow or suffering had left this girl guarded and untrusting, whereas her sister had likely been too young to remember.

Katara imagined herself as more happy and carefree before her mother's murder, her own personal trauma. And with everything that had happened since, she felt uncertain and unstable with so many family secrets suddenly coming to light. She didn't blame Siku for not wanting to speak of any horrors she'd seen or heard. She grew up believing that waterbending was a curse, after all.

After nearly an hour of nonstop fetch, the polar dog collapsed in exhaustion and rolled over on his back.

"He wants a belly rub," Sura said as she plopped down in the snow next to Stick.

Katara knelt at the dog's other side and happily obliged. "Who's a good boy, huh? Good boy, Stick! So good at fetch!"

Then an idea struck her. "Can I… try healing him? Or at least see what the sickness might be?"

Both girls went wide-eyed. "Can you make him not blind anymore?" Sura asked, her expression hopeful.

"No, I don't think so. But maybe I can—"

"Just do what you can."

The abruptness in Siku's tone gave Katara cause for hesitation, but a spark of curiosity danced in the girl's somber blue eyes. Katara nodded resolutely, then sheathed her hands in water while both onlookers marveled at its pearlescent glow. Stick whimpered slightly under her touch, so Katara went very slow, feeling the push and pull of his lifeblood under snow-matted fur and thick rippled muscle. She closed her eyes to concentrate.

The same foreign substance was there, although its traces were very faint in comparison to her other examinations. "Has he… always been blind?" she asked.

"No, only just recently. He was fine until he got sick," Siku answered, barely above a whisper.

"And he got better when you came here? To the… city?" Katara still struggled with what to call this place that only somewhat resembled what she remembered of home.

"Yes."

Katara also remembered Siku saying the sickness hit after the end of the war. Clearly there was a new contaminant present among the villagers, but not everyone had been affected. She had attributed an environmental cause, and felt further justified in her claim that whatever it was, it wasn't contagious.

It also wasn't responding to her waterbending, so what could it be? Something earthen—a mineral perhaps? She had witnessed Jeong Jeong restore functions of the nervous system with firebending, so it wasn't too far-fetched to believe that earthbenders could access the body's mineral stores. Dr. Yang had taught her a little about Earth Kingdom medicinal practices which mostly involved herbal treatments and mineral supplements. She now strongly suspected something dietary, as that would explain the sickness' apparent selectivity with its victims. While Katara pondered all these things, she felt the dog finally relax beneath her fingertips.

"What does he eat?" Katara must've been lost in her thoughts for a while, because when she spoke, the girls seemed to jolt back from their own reveries.

"He eats everything!" Sura chirped.

Siku rolled her eyes. "He'll eat _anything_."

"Yeah, sometimes we feed him—"

"Siku! Sura!"

Stick's ears perked up at the sound of a deep voice in the distance, and he gave a bellowing bark in response. Recognition also registered on the girls' faces, both going slightly pale.

"I didn't realize it was so late," Siku murmured.

"We'd better go!" Sura quickly pushed herself to her feet and scurried in the direction of the summoning with a bumbling polar dog at her heels.

The older girl lingered a few moments longer, looking warily at where her sister had just disappeared beyond the snow bank and then back at Katara.

"Are you trouble?" Katara wondered if she needed to speak with someone regarding their whereabouts after waterbending lessons. She hadn't even considered that their guardian might be worried about them.

"N-n-no," Siku started. "I just wanted to say—"

"So, this is the infamous Katara?" a man queried assertively as he walked toward them, hand in hand with a smiling Sura.

"Errr, yes sir?" Katara squinted at the approaching figures, silhouetted against the hour's twilight glow. It _was_ getting late, she'd just realized, which made her less inclined toward introductions. The hunting party should be back by now, and dinner would be starting soon. As if on cue, her stomach rumbled loudly.

"I'm Nilak." The man extended a hand. "Siku and Sura's father."

"Pleased to meet you," Katara said dutifully but instead of returning the gesture of his greeting, she bowed, Fire Nation style. Nilak quirked a brow at her, withdrew his outstretched arm, and shrugged. Katara realized her mistake a second too late to make up for it, but also gasped in shock at how naturally she recalled the Fire Nation traditions—almost more readily than her own. _How long have I been gone? Have I… lost myself along the way somehow?_

An awkward silence followed, one that Nilak finally filled by clearing his throat and continuing, "The girls told me about you. We should… have you over for dinner sometime. You know… if Stick approves."

Katara nodded and instinctively reached out her hand toward their oversized pet. Decidedly, Stick could knock someone over with that tongue of his, or perhaps with his dog breath alone. They all laughed at his antics and bid each other the farewell formalities, Water Tribe style this time, just as the sun disappeared beyond the horizon's silver lining.

Katara walked back to Gran Gran's hut in a state of stupor, overwhelmed by confusing thoughts about the day's events. She knew a conflict warred within her when it came to reconciling her heritage as Water Tribe and her future in marrying the Fire Lord. She also harbored a sense of betrayal and festering doubt when faced with certain realities about family members and their secretive pasts. But it was easier to push all of that away and focus on trying to fix a problem—why were people in Hanna's village so sick? She didn't think she'd be welcomed back there, especially when Kian recognized her bloodbending, but perhaps, if she were careful, she could get some answers from Siku, Sura, and Stick.

When she arrived within a few paces of the hut, she saw Sokka burst through the door in a frantic state. "Katara! There you are!"

"What, Sokka? Can't wait to eat your precious meat?" She did feel bad about being so late, but she also hoped they'd prepared dinner already. She was famished from all the fetching and healing and tiresome thinking.

Surprisingly, Sokka rushed to her side and grabbed her elbow, practically dragging her back to the door. "No, Katara! It's Dad. He's been bitten by a… a wolf leopard or something! He needs a healer!"

When she saw the mangled flesh and the paleness of her father's face, she dismissed her pressing hunger and its accompanying wave of exhaustion.

Whatever style of waterbending she was capable of, regardless of its damning implications, there was work to be done.


	14. As Fate Would Have It

After her confrontation with Yon Rha, Katara vowed to never use Hama's perversion of waterbending again. The healing possibilities didn't even occur to her until the need was dire, when it became a matter of life and death. On that fateful day that marked the end of a century-long war and the beginning of a new era, Katara coaxed a lightening-stricken heart back from the brink of death. She did it without even thinking, only feeling—the push and pull, the strengthening pulse, another person's life flowing beneath her fingertips.

She did it for love, she told herself. She didn't even know she loved Zuko until that moment, when she couldn't imagine life without him. So she reconciled that as long as she only used her ability for healing purposes, the sheer power of it would be justified. But with each life-saving opportunity since then, the option to bloodbend came so naturally, too easily. It scared her—this newfound level of comfort with something she swore to loathe. She couldn't deny its usefulness, but feared her ability to harness control. She was stronger now and more adept than ever—she no longer needed the backing of the full moon's power. Hama couldn't even do that, and it horrified Katara beyond all measure that apprentice had now surpassed the master.

It was too much, she decided, this life giving blessing and terrifying curse. She hated it, but did she even have a choice? She couldn't just let Ursa die that day she found her in Dr. Jung's office. Sure, she'd healed Colonel Chang just to prove she could do it. But then she'd saved Zuko _again_ and Uncle Iroh and now… her father.

Healing Hakoda was different, although Katara couldn't really say why. She loved him and would do anything to help him, of course. Perhaps there was something about a weakened parent before the eyes of his child, a vulnerability she never expected to witness from the man who'd raised her… at least until he left to fight in the war. Maybe that was part of it, too—she held her father's heart in her hands but didn't feel like she really _knew_ him. And if Katara let herself linger on the thought too long, she would've given anything for a chance to heal her mother, too.

It took several sessions over the next two days for Katara to be satisfied with her dad's progress. The loss of blood posed the biggest challenge—she could encourage the body along in its own healing process, but she could not create blood itself. Hakoda wasn't the most cooperative patient, either. He was determined to resume his duties as chief even though he could barely speak a coherent sentence.

He made several premature attempts to stand on his injured leg which undermined Katara's work to keep his circulation regulated. Recalling a certain Fire Lord's inability to rest and relax, she laughed at how similar and frustratingly stubborn they both were.

The dragon and the wolf made an unlikely pair, but she was glad they got along so well. Her father retold stories of their recent hunts and ice dodging with such fondness that Katara couldn't help but feel a twinge of jealousy. She wanted to talk to him about Gran Gran's story, aspects of her family history she never knew until now. She also wanted to warn him about Malina. There was something off about that woman, and Katara didn't consider her as fit to be her father's girlfriend. But she could never find a way to work these things into their truncated conversations.

The constant interruptions didn't help. Sokka kept trying to force feed quail chicken soup to both of them on Gran Gran's orders. Malina visited frequently, insisting she could take over _Koda's_ care from here. Even though Katara didn't voice her curt response aloud, Gran Gran had no qualms in saying what she thought about this. "Malina, you are not a healer. And besides, you're not even family."

 _Why couldn't Dad see? No one around here trusts Malina._

"She's so beautiful, yet fierce," Hakoda had mumbled that first night after the attack. "She doesn't belong here, though. The wolf… he didn't stand a chance."

Katara knew he was talking about the snow leopard and the encouter he'd witnessed in the tundra. But his words hung ominously in the air, as if he were actually talking about someone else.

"In the battle between wolf and snow leopard, the leopard will always win."

Katara feared that with those words, her father had sealed his own fate.


End file.
